Fox News Host Eric Bolling (Allegedly) Sent Unsolicited Dick Pics To Everyone But You

Hey! You know what I did not think I was gonna spend my Saturday morning writing about? Eric Bolling's penis. This is largely because I have never given any thought, whatsoever, to Eric Bolling's penis.
BUT HERE WE ARE.
According to a report from the Huffington Post, the Fox News host texted "an unsolicited photo of male genitalia" to at least two of his colleagues at Fox News. It doesn't specify that it was his genitalia, but do people normally send random pictures of other people's genitalia? At the very least, you'd think he'd be pretending it was his, right?
Via HuffPo:
At least a dozen sources linked to Fox News and Fox Business spoke with Huffington Post on condition of anonymity and the recipients of the alleged photos confirmed the contents of the text messages, which they said they found upsetting and offensive.One of the women told Huffington Post she responded to the text message, telling Bolling to never send her photos again and she received no response.
A Fox spokesperson told TPM: “We were just informed of this late Friday afternoon via the Huffington Post inquiry and plan to investigate the matter.”
Bolling’s attorney told Huffington Post that he “recalls no such inappropriate communications” and that Bolling doesn’t believe he sent them.
WELL. The wording on that rebuttal isn't exactly a hard no, now is it? Like, if someone were to tell me that I sent pictures of genitalia to my colleagues here at Wonkette, I would probably not say "I don't recall that" or "I don't believe that I did" -- I would say "I absolutely did not do that, that is absurd." He's clearly hedging his words here in case they have screenshots or can describe some kind of mole on his penis or something.
This is all very unsurprising given the slew of sexual harassment lawsuits agains Fox and it's male employees over the past year -- against Bill O'Reilly, Roger Ailes and more! It is honestly starting to look as though Fox checks to make sure that potential employees are really into trying to get women who are not into them to look at their penises.
Eric Bolling, of course, is the exact kind of dude who would send you a picture of his junk. Because do you know who sends women unsolicited dick picks? The kind of man that knows so little about women that he thinks sending a woman an unsolicited picture of his penis is likely to get him laid.
The kind of guy who calls a female fighter pilot "boobs on the ground."
Yeah.
While I will not discount the possibility of there maybe being women out there who, upon receipt of an unsolicited picture of a penis, would go "OH MAN, that is super hot. I should totally bone that guy, even though he is gross Eric Bolling," that is less than one percent of us, at least. Even if you feel very sure that the woman you wish to send pictures of your, or Eric Bolling's, penis to falls into that category, you should at least ask first. Just to be sure! Because you should always be sure that the people who see your penis are the people who want to see your penis. Otherwise, who are you to think you are any better than a subway flasher?
This is especially true if you work with the people to whom you have sent your dick pics -- you could find yourself in some trouble. Also it's rude. And weird.
If you are feeling bad that I had to spend EVEN ONE MINUTE soiling my pure mind with thoughts of Eric Bolling's penis, feel free to drop some pity money into our tip jar! Click below!
Robyn Pennacchia is a brilliant, fabulously talented and visually stunning angel of a human being, who shrugged off what she is pretty sure would have been a Tony Award-winning career in musical theater in order to write about stuff on the internet. Follow her on Twitter at @RobynElyse