There was a very well adjusted human being on the Laura Ingraham show Tuesday night, and she is so mad about all these schools closing down.

But she's mad for her own unique reason, and it is that the TEACHERS UNIONS are teaching our kids SEXTING and HOW TO WATCH PORN and also HOW TO BONE. Because these are lessons teenagers would be otherwise unable to learn on their own. She says "what they are doing is grooming our children for sexual predators to use them." WHOA HEY, did we just find us a moron who believes in #Pizzagate and QAnon? We are not sure, but sounds like her mind is working just as well as adherents to both of those conspiracy theories.

Media Matters with the video and the transcript of Rebecca Friedrichs, Fox News guest and normal person:



REBECCA FRIEDRICHS: The unions are using the closure of our schools as a smokescreen. Laura, here's why. Sadly, these unions are actually using our schools to sexualize our children and to train them in anti-American ideology.

Sexualize them and make them hate America? Is that one class, Ms. Freidrichs, or is one of them second period and the other is after lunch?

They do this with a coalition of over 180 organizations, including, sadly, the CDC, Planned Parenthood, and Black Lives Matter incorporated.

"Sadly," 180 organizations are doing this! "Sadly" the CDC is also sexualizing the kids and teaching them to hate America. And "sadly" Planned Parenthood and Black Lives Matter are doing it too, "sadly." Rebecca Friedrichs shares this "sadly," because of how it is "true" and a "thing that is definitely happening." Are the CDC and Planned Parenthood and Black Lives Matter taking turns teaching this class? Are they the sub? Where is the regular teacher?

Also how did she get through that without also baselessly accusing George Soros of something?

It is shocking what they're teaching our children online through virtual learning. They are teaching our children to sext ...

They don't need a class for that.

... to view pornography.

They don't need a class for that. (Or a how-to class. Has this woman ever met teenagers?)

They are hooking them up with online sex experts.

Like Dr. Ruth?

We are so confused. This is happening in online classes? Where the teacher can't see? What does she think the teachers' unions (and the CDC and Black Lives Matter) do, sneak into a secret block on Zoom where the teacher can't see them? Are they like "HEY LOOK OVER HERE, KIDS! PORN!", is that what they are like?

UPDATE: We have been informed by an astute Twitterer that Friedrichs is really upset about this COVID-19 guide for teens and sex, or something like it. It ... seems like just a really honest document for teens, about sex. People like Friedrichs do not tend to like anything involving honesty to teens about sex, especially if said honestly involves acknowledging that even if you try REALLY REALLY HARD to get them to do otherwise, they're still going to have sex.

So, what they are doing is grooming our children for sexual predators to use them. This is child abuse. I have an editorial about this tomorrow online in The Washington Times, people can read and learn all the details.

Oh shit, and this aired Tuesday night, so we guess this op-ed exists now in the very real and credible newspaper called the Washington Times and ... *Googles for a second* ... nope can't find it, don't care.

This is one of the big reasons that unions want to keep our schools closed. Because they can't sneak these evil lessons past loving teachers who have no idea by keeping them virtual.

OK. Seems like she just contradicted herself maybe, but screw it.

This woman, you might wonder if you have heard about her on Wonkette, and the answer is yes. She is a batshit anti-teachers-union activist who sued the state of California for something about how having to pay any kind of fee to the teachers' union is somehow a violation of her free speech. She even tried to win her case at the Supreme Court, but they were like nah lady fuck off. (Who do the unions have to thank for that? Dead Antonin Scalia.)

Clearly Ms. Friedrichs has gone on to bigger and better things, like telling Laura Ingraham online classrooms teach kids how to fuck 'n' sext.

In summary and in conclusion, what a normal person we have just fellowshipped with this afternoon, blessings be, OPEN THREAD.

[Media Matters]

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Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the senior editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

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