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Fox News Suddenly Loves Hollywood Elitists After Clint Eastwood Yelled At A Chair

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You guys, pity poor Hollie Mckay, entertainment/celebrity columnist and writer of the "Pop Tarts" column on the Fox News website! Most people in her line of work get to just wallow in America's sleaze and degradation openly in an attempt to gin up pageviews from a bored and horny audience. But Fox News, despite their thing generally being more "we hate taxes" rather than "we hate sex," feels a need to be at least kind of scoldy about our nation's moral decline, which means stories like "Lindsay Lohan 'very upset' over fresh theft allegations, friend says she's burning through cash" have to mix it up with "New study says full-frontal nudity on prime-time TV up 6,300 percent over last year." Plus all those Hollywood types are so darn liberal, which it's necessary to make fun of them over! But what if a major Hollywood icon, who, though a relative moderate, has been a public supporter of the Republican Party for his entire life, and even held elected office as a Republican, showed up at the Republican National Convention and had a weird, rambling dialogue with a piece of furniture before endorsing Mitt Romney? That would probably mean that Hollywood loves Republicans now and it's OK to take celebrity political opinions seriously, right?

There are few headlines you wil see today that will be more amazing than "Clint Eastwood stumping for Mitt Romney suggests shift in Hollywood's political paradigm, experts say." Because first, of course, a Republican endorsing a Republican isn't a "shift," and, haha, "experts," who might these celebrity experts be? Is celebrity political science a thing you go to school for? Isn't it kind of sad that just being a gossip columnist does't make you an expert, but you have to go quote other experts?

Anyway, the "experts" quoted are:

  • "Oscar-winning producer Gerald Molen, who's [sic] latest project is the controversial documentary '2016: Obama's America'
  • "New York-based political and entertainment publicist, Adam Weiss"
  • "Jeff Roe, political consultant and founder of Axiom Strategies"
  • "publicist and political expert Angie Meyer"

Sounds expert-y to us! These people mostly claim that Hollyweirdos are starting to sour on Obama because they are rich and dumb and easily deceived and are beginnging to hear rumors that Obama simply does not care for rich people. The article sadly also notes that obviously the huge majority of famous people still love Obama and have raised millions and millions of dollars for him, which does undermine the title a little bit. [Fox News]

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What's up fuckers? Were you waiting for me to come back from Mexico and write words at ya? Well, you know I don't write words at ya anymore, because of how I hate you, each, individually, but more importantly Trump has knocked all the words right out of my silly little lady brain.

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BONESAW WEEK WILL NEVER END! It's like Infrastructure Week, only stuff actually happens. And the stuff is all horrible! This morning, Saudi authorities indicted 11 suspects in the October killing of Jamal Khashoggi, announcing their intention to execute five of them. Despite copious evidence that the killing in the Turkish consulate was ordered by Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman, lackeys are going to take the fall -- with their heads. And the US Treasury Department dutifully responded by imposing sanctions on 17 Saudis "involved in the abhorrent killing" of a legal US resident who was in the process of applying for citizenship. So, we're good now, yes? We can go back to selling them murder machines to kill Yemeni civilians?

And then SHIT GOT WEIRD.

NBC reports that the Trump administration is so desperate to resume normal relations with Jared Kushner's BFF MBS that they're trying to trade 77-year-old cleric Fetullah Gülen -- a lawful resident of Pennsylvania for 20 years -- to the Turkish government in exchange for them dropping the inquiry into the Khashoggi murder.

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