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George Bush's Romantic NATO Tour!

hats hats hatsWhile America steeps in a cauldron of racial tension and John McCain terrorizes the nation's youth, George Bush is frolicking around the Ukraine and other far-flung parts of that land mass that sits between Germany and the Bering Strait. We refer, of course to the future member nations of NATO, a Cold War era organization formed in order to compete with an increasingly powerful OPEC. Join us on George Bush's whirlwind tour of poisoned world leaders!


Remember that guy on the right? He was handsome once. Then he got poisoned.

Here's to heavy metals!

He is trying not to laugh at her crazy hairdo and the unfortunately positioned darts in her dress that make her nipples look like razors.

Ladies and gentlemen, he would hit that

What else does George Bush do on a tour of the Ukraine? He hangs out with this guy, in a hat.

Do we love this hat photo? Yes.

In a sober moment, he reflects the first time he did blow in a gaudy, gold-plated Dallas bathroom that looked a lot like this church, minus the reading material.

Jonesing

Then it's on to Romania, where he enjoys a romantic walk on the flattest and most boring beach on the planet. Fortunately, he has heartthrob President Traian Basescu to keep him company.

Who forgot the suntan lotion?

Look at how disgusted their poor wives are. GET A ROOM, DUDES.

And thus concludes our tour.

All photos courtesy of AP.

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