January 18, 2008 02:52 PM
George Clooney Named U.N. 'Messenger of Peace'
United Nation Secretary-General Ban Ki-moon has named famous starlet George Clooney as the social club's ninth Messenger of Peace, because of his work doing something vaguely good for planet earth. Early reports indicate it was his phenomenal work in the film Ocean's Thirteen that sealed the deal for Secretary-General Bat Shit-moon.
Like other casino robbers, Clooney has at some point in his life pretended to care about Africa:
With fellow actors Don Cheadle and Brad Pitt, Clooney, 46, has used his celebrity status to raise money for refugees through their "Not On Our Watch" charity and draw attention to the crisis in Darfur in western Sudan.
At least I have a better understanding of why Bush gives so little of a shit about the U.N. now.