Georgia GOP Secretary Of State Tells Congressman From 'Hee Haw' Where To Stick It
Doug Collins Let That Sink In GIF by GIPHY News

Usually when we watch Republicans fight, we just like to make ourselves a nice sandwich and a beverage and watch them fight. But as we watch people continuing to attack Republican Georgia Secretary of State Brad Raffensperger, who is a dirty Republican but who's being attacked literally out loud for refusing to steal Georgia's election for the Republicans, we feel like we should side with him, at least tentatively, and only for the purposes of this particular fight. The people attacking him are just far viler. Hell, Raffensberger is going as far as to factcheck Donald Trump's bullshit, so we'll at least support him in that.

Also, when people write "Everybody hates you" letters to Doug Collins, AKA the congressman from "Hee Haw," AKA the loser who just lost Georgia's Senate jungle primary to universally loathed asshole Kelly Loeffler, well, we at least want to showcase their excellent meanness.

From Raffensperger's Facebook page:

My team secured and strengthened absentee ballots for the first time since 2005. As Secretary of State the first thing I did was push legislation that —OUTLAWED—absentee ballot harvesting in Georgia. Next, for the first time in the history of Georgia, Absentee ballots submitted through our electronic portal required photo ID. My team—we made that happen. Lastly, let's address this disinformation about signature match. We strengthened signature match. We helped train election officials on GBI signature match—which is confirmed twice before a ballot is ever cast. Failed candidate Doug Collins is a liar— but what's new?

We don't care about the first few sentences. They are garden-variety Republican garbage about protecting the integrity of the vote by making it harder to vote. That's kind of baked into this deal, because this guy is a dyed-in-the-wool Republican secretary of state.

But again, we repeat, this guy is a dyed-in-the-wool Republican secretary of state, and Georgia's two asshole senators are calling for his resignation, protecting their asses like cowards from Donald Trump's mean tweets, lest the base not show up for them in the runoff elections on January 5. In response to being attacked by Kelly Loeffler and David Perdue, Raffensperger in part said last week that he is "concerned about Republicans keeping the US Senate" and "recommend[s] that Senators Loeffler and Perdue start focusing on that."

And of course, Doug Collins, who really does make sounds from his facehole like he's auditioning for a methed out revival of "Hee Haw," has been leading the Trump effort in Georgia to "audit" the ballots, which is their cute way of saying "find some way to steal the state back for Trump." In particular, Collins and Trump have been telling lies about signature match in Georgia, and as the secretary of state, as the Republican secretary of state, Raffensperger is just clearly pretty pissed that these moron dickwads are trying to throw him under the bus simply because they're mad Joe Biden won Georgia when they weren't paying attention.

So the past day on his Facebook, he's been factchecking. He's factchecking them on signature matching and he's factchecking them on absentee ballots and he's factchecking Donald Trump's apeshit claims that somehow Dominion voting machines flipped one million Trump votes to Biden from Venezuela or whatever painthuffing shit they're going on about today.

For more on the infighting among Georgia Republicans, which is leading Donald Trump to waste his time yelling at Raffensperger and erstwhile Trump sycophants like Georgia Governor Brian Kemp for not stealing elections well enough for him, instead of focusing on trying to actually win those runoff elections, see the Wall Street Journal's excellent reporting.

Also, this new interview in the Washington Post, which includes this juicy tidbit:

Well then.


[Raffensperger on Facebook]

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Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the managing editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

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