Get A Load Of These Cranks Who Think They're Too Good For Trey Gowdy
OMG, now we've heard EVERYTHING. Donald Trump's super-secret, never met 'em, as seen on TV lawyers are shocked and appalled that Trump might add former Congressman Trey Gowdy to his august legal team.
"Are you kidding? ... Trey is a joke among us." Victoria Toensing told Yahoo News on Wednesday. "Trey Gowdy doesn't know shit."
"He's not on the team. Trey Gowdy is not on the team. Who told you Trey Gowdy? Not to my knowledge, not to Rudy's knowledge, not Joe's knowledge," Toensing went on. "I have to check that with Rudy because that would be a joke, because we all don't think much of him."
Yeah, Vicky, get Rudy on the horn and see what the rest of the Odd Squad has to say about this. While you're at it, how about a little trip down Memory Lane as we head to Happy Hour this Friday. (We're not going to speculate as to whether Miss Vicky was already feeling pretty happy when she talked to Yahoo.)
Our first stop will be March of 2018, when Donald Trump was desperate to find outside counsel to represent him in the Mueller investigation. After announcing that he was hiring Toensing and her husband Joe diGenova, Trump invited them to the White House for a meeting and then rescinded the offer, citing conflicts. Politico reported that Trump found them too old and "disheveled."
Which ... AHEM.
Yes, who could possibly think that Counselor Pornstache is a touch downmarket? It's crazy!
Toensing and diGenova run a law firm that represented various conservative, wingnut causes dating back to the Clinton-Lewinsky scandal. They appear to spend the bulk of their time on television flogging bullshit conspiracy theories about Uranium One, Ukrainium One and how the Clintons are OUT TO GET THEM.
Last month, Fox revealed that Toensing and diGenova were secretly helping Rudy Giuliani dig up dirt in Ukraine on Joe Biden. Toensing denied Chris Wallace's report that she and her handsome husband were working "off the books" for Trump.
Embarrassing. @ChrisWallace @FoxNewsSunday reporting this morning on hubby and me was categorically false. #maga2020— Victoria Toensing (@Victoria Toensing)1569782470.0
Which seems ... somewhat incongruous with what she told Yahoo on Wednesday.
It's not totally clear what arrangement Trump had with the couple, but he sure as hell didn't want to publicly acknowledge that he was getting help from some lady in a fuzzy nylon sweater and her husband who looks like a mob enforcer stuffed into a borrowed suit for a funeral. Particularly since the couple is currently representing exiled Ukrainian oligarch Dmytro Firtash in his bid to avoid extradition to the United States.
But please, Madame, go on about how Trey Gowdy, former Chair of the House Oversight Committee, CAN'T SIT WITH US because he didn't manage to LOCK HER UP Hillary Clinton.
"He screwed up the Benghazi hearings, and he came out with the advice to Trump, 'Well, if you've done nothing wrong, just talk to Bob Mueller.'" Toensing told Yahoo, just hours before Jay Sekulow announced that Gowdy would indeed be joining the president's legal team.
BUT WAIT! Turns out there may be a liddle' hiccup with Gowdy being hired under congressional ethics rules.
"I think there's a problem with — he can't start for another couple months because of lobbying rules and regulations," Trump told The Hill yesterday. "So you'll have to ask about that. I just heard that Trey Gowdy can't start til some time after January because of the lobbying rules and regulations. So I don't know. We'll have to see."
Oh, noes! Was Trey Gowdy looking "disheveled" at his meeting with the Trump as well? And after he gave up his Fox gig to argue that, despite the eleventy million hours of Benghazi hearings he personally presided over, AKSHULLY, OVERSIGHT IS ILLEGAL? Pour one out for Ol' Trey Gowdy. And another for Joe and Vicky, who are apparently, not "on the team" either.
"The president is being represented in his personal capacity — because he's still an American citizen with all the rights of an American citizen — by Jay and me," Giuliani told Yahoo News. "Joe and Vicky are not representing the president. They are … representing some people that have information that could be very valuable to us."
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Liz Dye lives in Baltimore with her wonderful husband and a houseful of teenagers. When she isn't being mad about a thing on the internet, she's hiding in plain sight in the carpool line. She's the one wearing yoga pants glaring at her phone.