Ghost Breitbart's Cold Dead Fingers: Shoot Em Up Yeehaw!
Ghost Breitbart has a helpful tip for anyone trying to make sense of the chaos in Boston today: It would all be much, much better if only more people were packing heat. In response to events in which arms-carrying private citizens have stopped zero bombings and helped to apprehend zero terrorists, but in which two private citizens with guns apparently shot an MIT police officer to death, Mike Flynn advises (and again, we're not linking because fuck them) that the manhunt for the surviving suspect, and the resulting lockdown of an entire city, "is a reminder of why millions of Americans cherish their right to own guns to protect themselves and their families." Yup. We pity the poor chicken that this man insists on fucking again and again.
The rest of Flynn's column explains that guns are NOT about hunting, or shooting sports, or anything else. They are about the fantasy of having control in an uncertain world:
Gun control advocates mistakenly assume Americans cherish their 2nd Amendment rights because of either a cultural anachronism or an affinity for hunting. The left looks at gun control as a debate over which guns Americans "need." They often argue, for example, that Americans don't "need" a 30-round magazine to hunt deer. That's true, but the debate isn't about "needs", it is about rights.
The 2nd Amendment is built on a foundation of hunting, [sic -- he prolly means "not built"] but, rather, the ability to protect one's life and property. The manhunt in Boston today shows the very real threats that occasionally enter our lives. In a situation like Boston, seconds count, while the police are minutes away.
OK, Flynn doesn't say anything about fantasies, but that's really the gist: if I had a gun, I could blow away bad guys, just like that cop did! Or should have! Mmmm, sweet sweet guns. Mike Flynn is fond of fantasies; he also predicted that Barack Obama would drop out of the 2012 election because he lost the Arkansas primary to some loon.
In any case, here is why The Gun Is Good. It makes the dream of safety a reality (in his dreams):
Hopefully the second Marathon bombing suspect will be apprehended today without additional loss of life. Moreover, let's hope that no one has to try and defend themselves against the suspected terrorists. Gun control advocates, though, would be wise to reflect on the unfolding events to understand why many of us "cling" to our guns.
The world can be a very dangerous place.
Yes, let's DO hope nobody blows a neighbor's head off because they saw something moving outside.
As Wonketteer-emeritus (or job-having slacker, we can't remember) Jesse Taylor sez, "When your argument is, 'A bad thing happened and guns are magic,' you have a bad argument."
[Twitter / BigGovernment no link -- we go there, so you won't have to]
Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.