Going Through The 'Watergate Jr. Four:' The One Who Wrote 'The Penis Monologues'

Going Through The 'Watergate Jr. Four:' The One Who Wrote 'The Penis Monologues'

The ACORNdouche-pimp. The one who bones Scott Brown's Daughter. And now we have the one who wrote an anti-feminist parody of The Vagina Monologues called The Penis Monologues, for his conservative George Washington University newspaper, THE PATRIOT. Let's see what Stan Dai wrote, in The Penis Monologues!

Quoth "The Giant Coochie Snorcher That Could," about a local Giant Coochie Snorcher lady.

"The Giant Coochie Snorcher That Could"

It all began when I moved into Crawford Hall... I had a bad feeling about coochie snorchers. In the past, they had been nothing but trouble--big trouble. But then one day, I walked out of my building and met my "neighbor," Joan. Joan is a GIANT COOCHIE SNORCHER, a 5-foot-tall vagina with a black plastic wig on her head! After Joan blocked my path and gave me a palm card for the March for Women Who Aren't Babies' Lives, I couldn't resist an invitation to her apartment-- Marvin Center 417. She slipped into fancy lingerie and lo and behold, I "now worship Joan," just as the placard around her "neck" said. If that's what it takes to be a feminist, just to worship a 5-foot-tall vagina, I'm a guy...I am so there!

"My Angry Penis"

MY PENIS IS ANGRY!!!!!!! You want to know what happened to my penis? Joan happened to my penis! There I was, sleeping peacefully when Joan stormed in and dragged me out for "an educational program." I thought was going to see Mr. Rogers! But nooooooo! It turned out to be the "Whine-gina Monologues!"

An afterword, or forward, or both:

What are these vaginas angry about? Tampons, thong underwear, and gynecologists. Shouldn't feminists be more concerned with encouraging women to go to the gynecologist to prevent cervical, uterine, and breast cancer (which, of course, are the fault of evil repressive men)? Why must the only reference to the sanctity of motherhood be given to a lesbian couple? Can't men be more than just sperm donors and rapists in a feminist's world? Justice Blackmun doesn't even get a shout-out! If feminists want to really make a difference, why don't they get out and change the world, instead of sitting in basements writing a litany of complaints to depress the world.

God, someone buy this kid a prostitute and let him finally get it over with, right?

Is this the same Stan Dai arrested for trying to bug Mary Landrieu's office? [Lindsey Beyerstein]

The Penis Monologues [TPM]


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