On Thursday, I got an email from the One Million Moms, re: cereal. You see, Kellogg's made a special cereal for Pride Month in collaboration with GLAAD and t just ... it just breaks Monica Cole's wee little heart to see all of the cereal mascots gathering around a cereal bowl of sin, or whatever it is she thinks is happening here.

It is not the first email I have gotten from "them," re: cereal. In 2019, they were also upset at cereal for the same reason they are currently mad at cereal. In 2019, the company came out with "All Together" cereal, which consisted of "Raisin Bran, Corn Flakes, Rice Krispies, Frosted Flakes, Froot Loops and Frosted Mini Wheats" all mixed together, and they were very upset about that as well.

This time it is called "Together With Pride" and "features berry-flavored, rainbow hearts dusted with edible glitter," which sounds a lot more like a thing people would want to actually eat. I mean, the other idea was cute and all but edible glitter is obviously a better time than combining Raisin Bran and Froot Loops, which actually seems kind of terrible.


The One Million Moms Who Definitely Exist And Are Named George Glass are mad because they think Kellogg's is "targeting" their children and, I guess, trying to turn them gay and/or transgender with supportive mascots and glitter cereal — which their children, for the record, are in no way obligated to eat. It is unclear exactly how they imagine this would happen. Like they're gonna be walking through the grocery store with their kid and the kid sees the box, is entirely aware of the fact that it is LGBTQ+ pride themed glitter cereal and thinks to themselves "Whell! If Tony The Tiger and Toucan Sam say it is okay to be gay and/or trans, I'm gonna go be that.

Although I guess that would explain why, despite the fact that I was not allowed to have cereal with marshmallows, I grew up to be a leprechaun.

Dear Robyn,

Kellogg's has supported the homosexual community for a long time, and now it is obvious they are going after our children. As part of an effort to say "all are welcome," Kellogg collaborates with the Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation (GLAAD) advocacy group once again.

Kellogg's calls it Together With Pride cereal, an exclusive, limited-time offer in which the cereal brand's famous mascots are promoting sin. The cereal, which "features berry-flavored, rainbow hearts dusted with edible glitter," was previously only available online but will now be sold in select stores nationwide.

To attract children, the Together With Pride limited-edition box features beloved characters including Mini holding a Pride flag (from Frosted Mini Wheats), Toucan Sam, Tony the Tiger, Sunny (from Raisin Bran), Honey Smacks Dig'em Frog, Snap, Crackle & Pop, and Cornelius (from Corn Flakes). But the most disturbing feature is the box top that has a special spot for children to add their own pronouns of choice which encourages children to pick their pronouns.

"Now your kids can write their pronouns on their cereal box! So fun! Affirm their gender, with Kellogg's!" one user on Twitter captioned it. For every box sold, Kellogg is donating $3 to GLAAD to support the LGBTQ+ community.

TAKE ACTION

Kellogg's needs to hear from you. Supporting the homosexual agenda versus remaining neutral in the cultural war is just bad business. If Christians cannot find corporate neutrality with Kellogg's, then they will vote with their pocketbook and support companies that are neutral.

The please just remain neutral in the culture war tack is one they've been using in practically every one of their campaigns in recent years. It acknowledges the fact that they've lost and that no one actually wants to be on their side anymore, while also asking these companies to do the same thing they used to ask them to do, which is to just pretend that LGBTQ people don't exist.

This must be particularly galling for them, being that Dr. John Harvey Kellogg was just about as creepy as they are when it came to wanting to control people's sexuality.

Oddly enough, OMM is pretty slow on the uptake with this anti-cereal business. Various other right-wing people and organizations started planning to boycott Kellogg's over this shit months ago. The hilariously named American Society for the Protection of Tradition, Family and Property had their anti-cereal petition out back in May, which is also when Newsmax host Grant Stinchfield went on a weird rant about that and then veered into a bunch of speculation on Lucky the Leprechaun's sexuality.

There is a lot of competition these days for who can say the most asinine things about companies that acknowledge the existence of LGBTQ+ people, and if One Million Moms wants to stay in this game, they're gonna have to be a little less slow on the uptake.

Do your Amazon shopping through this link, because reasons.

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Robyn Pennacchia

Robyn Pennacchia is a brilliant, fabulously talented and visually stunning angel of a human being, who shrugged off what she is pretty sure would have been a Tony Award-winning career in musical theater in order to write about stuff on the internet. Follow her on Twitter at @RobynElyse

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