Michigan GOP Nominee, World’s Worst Dad Says Truly Vile Sh*t About Rape
Republican Robert Regan is running to represent Michigan’s House District 74 in the state legislature. Sunday, Regan grossed everyone out during a Facebook Live discussion hosted by the Big Lie-promoting Rescue Michigan Coalition. Republican strategist Amber Harris patiently explained to her fellow conspiracy theorists that it's “too late” to change the results of the 2020 election. Her opinion's based on the complicated space-time principle that it’s currently 2022. Harris suggested Republicans move on and instead focus on races in the future, which are easier to win because people haven't voted yet.
Regan’s response to Harris was repugnant: “I tell my daughters, ‘Well, if rape is inevitable, you should just lie back and enjoy it.’ ”
No, really, that’s what the asshole said. Here’s the video.
\u201cI tell my daughters, \u2018If rape is inevitable, you should just lay back and enjoy it,\u2019\u201d says Robert Regan, the favorite to represent MI\u2019s 74th district in the state house.pic.twitter.com/3APRLfKxgG— Ross Jones (@Ross Jones) 1646674855
Harris told Regan: "I’ve got advice to give to your daughters: Don’t do that. Fight all the time.”
The discussion had bizarrely veered into best practices for rape victims.
Before Harris could tell Regan how “shameful" his remarks were, he treated everyone to a rambling, nonsensical Biblical metaphor.
REGAN: That’s not how we roll. That’s not how I won this election. We go right at it, so what we did, we … knocked Goliath down with the stone. As good Bible people, you know how did David kill Goliath? It wasn’t the stone. When Goliath was knocked down, Goliath’s sword cut off his head.
Regan demanded that the Big Lie believers keep fighting their mythical battle: "We won this election. We’ve got the motivation. We do want to decertify this election. We do want it returned to the rightful owner … that’s Donald Trump. That’s what I’m pushing for."
President Joe Biden defeated Trump in Michigan by almost three percentage points. Regan is not fully tethered to reality, but the rape comments were too much even for the Michigan GOP. Michigan Republican Party Chairman Ron Weiser denounced Regan in a statement Tuesday.
"Mr. Regan’s history of foolish, egregious and offensive comments, including his most recent one are simply beyond the pale,” Weiser said ... "We are better than this as a party and I absolutely expect better than this of our candidates.
Kent County Republican Party Chairman Rob VerHeulen echoed Weiser's statement, saying Regan owes voters an apology.
Obviously, Regan has not apologized. That’s not how mighty Goliath slayers roll.
“Sometimes, my words aren’t as smooth and polished as the politicians are because I’m not a politician. I’m working on it,” Regan said. “The only reason the (politically) left trolls attack you is because they know you're directly over the target, dropping direct hits on an issue. If you're not scoring hits, they leave you alone.”
Regan sucks so bad his own daughter begged people not to vote for him in 2020. Stephanie Regan tweeted simply but passionately: “If you’re in Michigan and 18+ pls for the love of god do not vote for my dad for state rep. Tell everyone.”
He blamed his daughter’s anti-endorsement on the thorough brainwashing she’d received in college.
"A lot of students when they go off to these liberal university campuses, like the University of Colorado, the University of Texas and Austin — and she went to the University of Colorado in Boulder — and you know, they just kind of get sucked into this Marxist, communist ideology and she and I just don’t see eye to eye when it comes to the whole socialism, communism, Marxist philosophy,” he said.
Regan said that on a political scale of 1 to 10, he was "like the right wing, a 10, and she’s like a zero.” How touching. He suggested Stephanie Regan had gotten indoctrinated into the Black Lives Matter cult and was now ranting about “systemic racism,” which he doesn’t believe exists. (Although, he claims abortion clinics target the Black community.)
"You know, as a quote-unquote rich, white, Christian male, people look at me a certain way. And it’s not always good. So, everybody has obstacles to overcome."
He insisted that Donald Trump had "done more for the Black community than any president we’ve had in the last 20 years.” Guess we’ll have to agree to disagree.
Regan didn’t make it out of the 2020 primary for Michigan’s District 73, but his smug ass won last week’s special primary election for District 74 by 81 votes, defeating three other Republicans whose children probably — okay, maybe — like them.
Even after all this, Regan is still favored to prevail over Democrat Carlee Knott in November’s general election. Voters should really consider Stephanie Regan’s advice.
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Stephen Robinson is a writer and social kibbitzer based in Portland, Oregon. He writes make believe for Cafe Nordo, an immersive theatre space in Seattle. Once, he wrote a novel called “Mahogany Slade,” which you should read or at least buy. He's also on the board of the Portland Playhouse theatre. His son describes him as a “play typer guy."