GOP's Awesome Plan To Make America All Better, Starting With Killing A Million Jobs

John Boehner and Mitch McConnell have affixed their names to a VERY IMPORTANT op-ed in the Wall Street Journal today,* explaining all the terrific fresh new ideas that they'll be able to accomplish with their brand-new Republican control of Congress. It's so fresh and exciting! Just lookie:

Looking ahead to the next Congress, we will honor the voters’ trust by focusing, first, on jobs and the economy. Among other things, that means a renewed effort to debate and vote on the many bills that passed the Republican-led House in recent years with bipartisan support, but were never even brought to a vote by the Democratic Senate majority. It also means renewing our commitment to repeal ObamaCare, which is hurting the job market along with Americans’ health care.

That's so awesome, how they're going to improve the economy and encourage more jobs -- and if they succeed in repealing Obamacare (which they will, because why would Obama veto a repeal when it's so obvious that the People Have Spoken?), they're really going to have to create a lot of jobs in a hurry, because as ThinkProgress editor and Tweeter smart guy Igor Volsky notes, the healthcare sector has added a million healthcare jobs -- that's private sector jobs -- since the Affordable Care Act passed in 2010. But sure, let's go ahead and take health coverage away from 15 million people. That should be great for jobs!

In another bit of elegant fantasy, Yertle and the Annoying Orange also promise that, in addition to doing away with the ACA altogether, they'll reform it, too, with a proposal to

restore the traditional 40-hour definition of full-time employment, removing an arbitrary and destructive government barrier to more hours and better pay created by the Affordable Care Act of 2010.

You see, the 40-hour work week was utterly destroyed by the ACA's requirement that employers provide insurance for any employee getting 30 hours a week, and now no one has a fulltime job anymore, except, oops, that's a lie too. Rick Ungar at radical leftwing propaganda outlet Forbes debunked that whopper all the way back in March:

It turns out that there has, in fact, been no such rush to reduce work hours. Indeed, numbers released last week reveal that precisely the opposite is taking place.

According to the Bureau of Labor Statistics (BLS), the number of part-time workers in the United States has fallen by 300,000 since March of 2010 when the Affordable Care Act was passed into law. What’s more, in the past year alone — the time period in which the nation was approaching the start date for Obamacare — full-time employment grew by over 2 million while part-time employment declined by 230,000.

There's also a whole bullet-pointed list of issues that the Monkey & Turtle Show will take on, but you know what's on it already: Keystone XL pipleine will give everyone a jerb, we have to do something about the debt without increasing taxes, and never mind that the deficit is the lowest since 2008, and Yadda Yadda Yadda.

Thank god, they also promise to finally do something about the "savage global terrorist threat that seeks to wage war on every American," so who knows, maybe that's a pledge to actually have a Congressional debate about our brand new war -- you know, the one that both houses refused to take a vote on, or even discuss, before skedaddling home for over a month to complain that Barack Obama wasn't doing anything about ISIS.

[WSJ* / Forbes / Forbes again]

* If you can't read the article from our link, just do a Google search on the title, "Now We Can Get Congress Going," and you will magically vanquish the WSJ paywall.

Doktor Zoom

Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.


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