If you're not genius enough to figure out the rules ofkickball, then you might want to try dodgeball, which is so simple that common children play it every day, in America. The 4th Annual Dodging Diabetes Charity Dodgeball Tournament -- that's right, pretend the ball is a jelly doughnut and STAY AWAY -- is taking place this Saturday in Rockville.

The whole charity aspect of it might be a deterrent to participation, as tickets are $300 per team, but it's for a good cause, people! Perhaps you could get 100 people on your team, and then tickets would only be $3. Now there's genius!

Registration has been extended to Friday, so get it together and go outside and do something for the Forces of Good. You can also have your business or whatever sponsor a team, if you are charitable yet slothful.

4th Annual Dodging Diabetes Charity Dodgeball Tournament. Saturday, March 7, 2009. Champions Field House.

Right. And Megan Rapinoe just said win or lose, she has no interest in meeting your crusty ass, because no decent American would consider that an honor.

Besides, she has already been to the White House to meet a legitimately elected president:

By the by, the owner of the incorrect Megan Rapinoe account saw Trump's whining and told him to grow a dick and set it on fire:

Ya burnt!

But as we said, it was a whole day of batshit from Trump, so let's continue.

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