Gracious Man-King Donald Trump Will Not Lock Up Political Rival, For 'Emails'

Kellyanne Conway, advisoress to American President-elect Mister Donald J. Trump,announced on the television programme "Joe of the Morning" that Mr. Trump was too gracious to appoint a special prosecutor to root around in losing presidential candidate Hillary Clinton's emails just one more time so as he could "lock her up." He hoped, Conway said, and this is an actual quote, to "help her heal" from everyone not trusting her because of how she is so "crooked" all the time, and dishonest, and once -- don't know if you guys have heard -- she had an email server in her home.

“When the president tells you he doesn't wish to pursue the charges, it sends a strong message,” Conway said in an interview on MSNBC's Morning Joe. “I think Hillary Clinton still has to face the fact that a majority of Americans don't find her to be honest or trustworthy, but if Trump can help her heal, perhaps that's a good thing.”

Sure, a special prosecutor might have a tough time finding a crime if the FBI already investigated Hillary Clinton's dastardly AOL account -- like, A LOT -- and determined there was no crime there, even though it made FBI director James Comey sad. Hillary Clinton fired her travel agent, and there were five separate investigations. But given enough time, a special prosecutor probably could investigate Monica Lewinsky again.

Despite the fact there is no evidence of a crime that any prosecutor would see fit to pursue, the king will let you live anyway, Hillary Clinton. FOR NOW.

In the meantime, Clinton was spotted shopping for books like a total liberal elite, by this dumb lady who doesn't even know she is supposed to find Clinton untrustworthy and dishonest, and that you shouldn't read books anyway because you don't need them, just "common sense":

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Oh, our eyes! Are 69-year-old women allowed to go without makeup? Can Donald Trump do an executive order about that please? How is that even America?

Lock her up.


Rebecca Schoenkopf

Rebecca Schoenkopf is the owner, publisher, and editrix of Wonkette. She is a nice lady, SHUT UP YUH HUH. She is very tired with this fucking nonsense all of the time, and it would be terrific if you sent money to keep this bitch afloat. She is on maternity leave until 2033.


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