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Did you hear he fucks black guys? He fucks black guys, and he wants you to know that.


Let's put out of our heads how appalling it is that Milo Yiannopoulos, homogay conservative internet troll from hell, has (according to Milo) been credentialed for a White House press briefing. There are no words, and it is Friday, so let's not dwell too hard on just how much Donald Trump's "presidency" has degraded America in the space of two weeks.

For real, this is happening:

Milo Yiannopoulos, a writer for the far right Breitbart News website, claims he's attending a White House press briefing on Friday.

"I'm a senior editor at America's most influential news outlet. How the f--k do you think?" Yiannopoulos told the Daily News in a Thursday evening email when asked how he obtained credentials for the presidential briefing.

America's most ... what? Did Milo find time between having college talks canceled to have that surgery where you get ribs removed so you can suck your own dick? Like, we know Steve Bannon, who supposedly has nothing to do with Breitbart anymore, is the real president, but can we really call Breitbart America's most influential news outlet?

Ah, but there we go, being appalled again. JoeMyGod already suggested a couple questions Milo could ask, like, "Mr. Spicer, do you agree that feminism causes cancer?" and Wonkette also too would like to make some suggestions:

  • "Mr. Spicer, I have a question and also a follow-up. On a scale of one to OMG MY FAVORITE, how great are black dicks? And my follow-up is, did you hear about how I like black dicks a lot?"
  • "Mr. Spicer, rumor has it Frederick Douglass is back around these days, and doing a GREAT job. Do you have his phone number? Because again, I'm really into black guys."
  • "Mr. Spicer, Do you agree that I'm just SO CONTROVERSIAL, like oh my stars, what IS Milo going to say next, it will be such a surprise!"
  • "Mr. Spicer, can Mr. Trump please do an executive order to make them give me back my Twitter?"
  • "Mr. Spicer, that Leslie Jones, what a fat hog, right??????"
  • "Mr. Spicer, look at me, I'M MILO! What a outrageous boy I am, just an outrageous boy!"
  • "Mr. Spicer, will President Trump do an executive order to uninvent the washing machine, so stupid ladies can be happy again?"
  • "Mr. Spicer, did you see that time I burned a gay rainbow flag for Donald Trump, to stick it to the gays, of which I am one, because WHOA BLACK DICKS JUST COMIN' AT ME FROM ALL SIDES BUT MOSTLY TOWARD MY BOTTOM? I am edgy!"
  • "Mr. Spicer, does Ivanka think it's gross when I call the president 'Daddy'? Because it makes me aroused!"

Yeah that's all we got, gonna go throw up now. Feel free to do more questions in the comments, which are never allowed.

[New York Daily News]

Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the senior editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

Follow him on Twitter RIGHT HERE.

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