It's a Friday in Trump's America, which means shit is probably about to hit the fan in some kinda way, but why not just get terrified and horrified all by yourself, huddled up under a weighted blanket and silently asking God when it's all going to stop? TGIF, right?

Politico has published a truly horrifying look at the early days of Trump administration foreign policy, and Wonkette can't really summarize it for you (yes we could, but do not want), so we're going to throw some block quotes at your face and say GO READ THE WHOLE THING.

The excerpts we're sharing are selected vignettes, compiled by reporter Nahal Toosi, from MANY current and former career officials at the Trump National Security Council (NSC), or as Trump hacks call them, "Obama holdovers." You know, the Deep State. Hillary's little servants. In other words, the experts who spend their lives devoted to their country, not to one presidential administration or the other, to keep Americans safe and ... oh fuck it.

These sources are some pissed off people.

We Do Nazi How Sebastian Gorka Got Access To This Meeting!

Shut up, Wonkette, Seb Gorka is NOT A NAZI! Anyway:

One Trump appointee, conservative commentator Sebastian Gorka, would show up at random meetings, even though it was never clear whether he had the proper security clearance, and he would often raise unrelated points. One former White House official recalled Gorka saying such things as, "'If you look at what Napoleon did ...' and we'd all be like, 'I don't even know how to respond to that.'" (Asked for comment, Gorka told a POLITICO reporter, "Take a long run off a short pier, you utter hack.")

This sounds par for the course for a guy who drives a snowflake 4-cylinder Mustang he illegally parks all over the place (he got a ticket for doing that at CPAC apparently, after he wailed at the crowd about how the era of the pajama boy would be over, if it weren't for the upcoming HAMBERDER GENOCIDE, you know, same way it happened under mean old Stalin).

Napoleon. PFFFFFFT.

On that subject, #NeverForget:

Gorka: The alpha males are back on January 20th

That clip never stops being the funniest chickenshit thing we have ever seen in our entire lives.

A Lot Of People Don't Know Abraham Lincoln, Our Second Greatest President After TRUMP, Was A Republican!

Trump often seemed in disbelief that he, of all people, was now occupying such a weighty office. A former staffer recalls being in an informal meeting in Flynn's office when the president burst into the room. Trump apologized for interrupting but said he wanted to show them something. An aide came in with a framed photo of the 16th president. "Abraham Lincoln. President Abraham Lincoln," Trump said, according to the ex-staffer. "They've got all kinds of cool stuff here."

Very cool, and also very legal!

President Speak & Spell Can't Make Foreign Policy Decisions Without Some Pretty Pictures To Look At!

We already knew this, but:

At [Michael] Flynn's request, the Obama administration had held off on deciding whether to arm Kurdish fighters to help recapture the Syrian city of Raqqa from the Islamic State terrorist group. According to two former NSC staffers, immediately after Trump took office, the NSC staff sent Flynn and his top deputies a detailed memo around 10 pages long that laid out the pros and cons of arming the Kurds, along with every document Trump needed to sign off on a decision. A few weeks passed, and a Flynn deputy told the staffers that what they'd sent up was too long and complicated — could they shorten it? So the staffers cut the memo in half. Days later, a new instruction: Could they cut it down further and turn much of it into graphics? The president preferred pictures. So the NSC staffers, with aid from intelligence officials, devised a graphical version. The issue dragged on anyway; it wasn't until May that Trump decided to arm the Kurdish fighters.

And then who got blamed? A Trump administration official told the Washington Post it was "poor staff work," to which the sources who talked to Politico replied OH GO FUCK YOURSELF.

Trump Taking Cold, Wet Shits On Refugees And Trying To Ban Muslims Really Was Hard On Career Staff ... You Know, The NSC People Who Actually Love Their Country.

"I'll never forget the morning I fell apart," one former staffer said. "I was reading a New York Times article about a refugee named Mustafa. ... I just lost it. I was bawling. A few days later, I confessed I'd given a bunch of money to some refugee agency. And everyone around me said, 'I did, too!' We just wondered how many thousands of dollars had come from the NSC staff." The former staffer continued, head shaking in wonder: "These [executive orders] were, like, written in crayon, like The Heritage Foundation intern just came up with them. They just weren't very good. … It wasn't just bad policy. It was bad policy poorly executed. I could have done it better."


Career Folks Not Racist Or Stupid Enough, So Trump People Made Their Lives Hell In Ways Large And Small!

Small ways:

[C]areer staffers say they became objects of suspicion because of language they used, such as saying "undocumented immigrants" instead of "illegals." One former U.S. official who frequently dealt with the NSC says he stopped taking his print edition of The New York Times to the White House because Trump appointees gave him dirty looks.


Trump political appointees were believed to frequently talk to journalists who worked for conservative media outlets. For months, those outlets published names of career Civil and Foreign Service officers in the NSC and other government agencies whose loyalties they deemed suspect. Career staffers who had joined the U.S. government many years, sometimes decades, earlier were suddenly cast as Obama loyalists determined to derail Trump's agenda as part of a "deep state." The people targeted included a State Department civil servant of Iranian descent who'd joined government under the George W. Bush administration; a highly respected Foreign Service officer who dealt with Israeli issues; and an NSC staffer who dealt with European and Russian issues. The latter, Eric Ciaramella, reportedly left the NSC after receiving death threats. Another staffer targeted by conservative outlets was Fernando Cutz, a Latin America expert and top aide to McMaster; at one point he had to temporarily get police protection.

Totally normal, and exactly what you'd expect if you were working for a particularly shitty mafia organization, but not when you're working for the US government.

As we said, go read the whole thing, because we skipped lots of stuff.

The moral of the story is that the early days of the Trump White House and the NSC were an utter shitshow of proportions that were devastating for national security. They were terrible under Michael Flynn, they got a little better when H.R. McMaster was national security advisor, but now that John Bolton is in the job, it's a total shitshow again and the career people who are left are scared.

But hey, who needs the NSC anyway? Jared and Ivanka have security clearances even though they're pretty obviously compromised by hostile foreign powers just like Daddy. Obviously, everything is fine.



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Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the senior editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

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You guys, hi, hello, it is almost the holiday weekend, so we are going to share you a real video posted last night by "Doctor" Sebastian "Don't Call Me A Nazi" Gorka, that hilarious old knucklecuck. We guess now that he had to give up (or gave up voluntarily!) his Fox News contract, he just makes videos for the Twitter. Hoo ... ray?

Anyway, Gorka is super-excited that Donald Trump issued that order last night, giving Bill Barr all kinds of new powers to expose the Deep State for what it is and PROVE once and for all that the gremlins who live inside Trump's diarrhea are correct when they say Hillary ordered the Deep State to do an illegal witch hunt to Trump, yadda yadda yadda, you've seen these people huff paint before, we don't have to type it all.

Here is the video, after which Wonkette will either transcribe it OR we will provide our own dramatic interpretation. Which one will it be? We don't know! Would you be able to tell the difference between the two? We don't know!

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We want to say right here at the outset that we hate Julian Assange. Aside from the sexual assault allegations against him, and aside from the fact that he's just a generally stinky and loathsome person who reportedly smeared poop on the walls at the Ecuadorian embassy in London, while reportedly not taking care of his cat, an innocent creature, he acted as Russia's handmaiden during the 2016 election, in order to further Russia's campaign to steal it for Donald Trump. All signs point to his campaign being a success!

So we are justifiably happy when bad things happen to Julian Assange. We are happy his name is shit the world over, and that any reputation WikiLeaks used to have for being on the side of freedom and transparency has been stuffed down the toilet where it belongs. We are happy he looked like such a sad-ass loser when the Ecuadorian embassy finally kicked him out and he was arrested.

And quite frankly, we were OK with the initial charge against him recently unsealed in the Eastern District of Virginia. If you'll remember, he was charged with trying to help Chelsea Manning hack a password into the Defense Department, which is not what journalists do. Journalists do not drive the get-away car for sources. Journalists do not hold their sources' hair back while they're stealing classified intel. Assange is essentially accused of doing all that.

Now, put all that aside. Because -- and this is key -- journalists do publish secrets they are provided by sources. That's First Amendment, chapter and verse, American as fucking apple pie and fast-food-induced diabetes. And that is what much of the superseding indictment of Assange unsealed yesterday was about. (And nope, it wasn't about anything regarding Assange's ratfucking the 2016 election or Hillary's emails. Why would the Trump Justice Department prosecute anything about that? It's all about the older Chelsea Manning stuff, the stuff the Obama Justice Department considered charging Assange with, but ultimately declined, because of that little thing called the First Amendment.)

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