Happy New Year, Washington (Be Nice To Your Liver!)

Happy New Year, Washington (Be Nice To Your Liver!)

Because everyone spent 2010 impoverished and hungry, watching luscious BP oil spill into the Gulf and belittling America by enjoying a sport loved byLatinos, New Year's festivities this year may be a little less exciting. But as 2010 could very well be the last year America can even afford to have its own New Year's celebration, there's no sense in skipping the parties this year. May 2011 be the year you drink like you have preexisting condition, love like you're gay in the military and fall back in love with our Kenyan Master. Hello, 2011!

This New Year's you can party in D.C. like a ...

  • Hipster: Enjoy an evening with fellow plaid shirt and tight jean enthusiasts at the Brightest Young Things' New Year's party at Bohemian Caverns. The party features an open bar, DJs and a Gay Jamboree Opium Den. Of course it does. Tickets are $55. [Brightest Young Things]
  • Cuban Yuppie in Socialist Obamaland: Cuba Libre is hosting a late night bar celebration complete with a floor show and salsa, meringue, Latin house and tropical dance music. The $20 ticket does not include drinks, but it does include party hats and favors. [Cuba Libre]
  • Beer addict: Beer palace ChurchKey has 50 beers on draft, and will allow you to drink as much of them, as well as select wines and gourmet foods topped with bacon, as you want -- so long as you pay them $150. [ChurchKey]
  • Person who is too fancy to even bother: Both Bar Pilar and Cafe Saint Ex are doing nothing extraordinary for New Year's. Should you go to either restaurant, you'll get get delicious food, great beers and good music, just like you would at either bar on any Friday night. [Bar Pilar, Cafe Saint Ex]
  • Person stuck in 2006: If you find yourself in Georgetown on New Year's (Godspeed!), and so long as you've already waterboarded yourself with vodka, try Smith Point. They're celebrating the New Year with an open bar from 10PM to 1AM and a band that boasts members from both sides of the Mason Dixon Line. So, a bar band from Annapolis and Dover? [Smith Point]
  • A Proud Virginian: Clarendon Ballroom is at least offering more than just a DJ at their pricey New Year's celebration: The $65 ticket also includes a buffet, four drink tickets, and a Champagne toast. [Clarendon Ballroom]
  • A dirty liberal: Woolly Mammoth Theatre is hosting a Champagne and Tiaras New Year's Eve Bash. The evening includes a performance of the Second City's "A Girl's Guide to Washington," followed by a party with a photo booth, food and drink, and tiaras for all. Tickers are $65. [Wolly Mammoth Theater]

And, when it's all said and done, head to Firefly for their New Years Day booze-y free-for-all brunch -- from 12PM to 6PM, bloody marys and draft beers will be $3.  [Firefly]

Happy New Year!


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