Healthiest Way To Wipe Butt. Tabs, Mon., Feb. 28, 2022

Tabs gif by your comrade Martini Ambassador!

Tulsi is backpedaling harder harder, but Glem Greenwald is still fuckin' at it — in this case retweeting Tucker Max (TUCKER MAX) to make the point that there is war propaganda afoot, which does tend to happen when one country invades another. (Lawyers, Guns and Money)

"So, Putin expected Afghanistan in 2021. But he got Afghanistan in 1979." — Politico

"Someone needs to do a SWIFT splainer," I said to my husband. "Go to Vox," he said, "that is kind of their thing." But that seemed like a lot of trouble when I could just wait for Noah Smith to send one straight to my inbox. (NoahPinion)

Russian TV host weeps: But mah Italian villa. And oh what's this?

While most in the West are too savvy to take Russian propaganda at face value, Moscow’s experts are grateful to have the ones who broadcast Kremlin-friendly talking points. Referring to Tucker Carlson as “the most popular host in the United States” during Thursday’s segment of The Evening With Vladimir Soloviev, the host complained: “They’re accusing him of being a Russian spy.” Analyst Dmitry Drobnitsky replied: “Well, Tucker is most definitely ours. That’s that.”

Daily Beast

That piece ended: "During his Friday broadcast, amid tense discussions of Western sanctions, Soloviev theatrically looked down at his watch and asked: 'Is Trump coming back soon?'" Which makes it very hard for my brain case to understand why apparently a very solid majority of Americans in different polls think Putin would not have invaded Ukraine if Trump were still president. I do not fucking understand you people. (Not you people. The rest of you people.) (Guardian)

Like dipshit over here, are you kidding me what the fuck.

Remember when Senate Republicans led by Mitch McConnell voted down sanctions on Putin? Mother Jones remembers.

That's a good hed, Lawyers, Guns & Money: "FIFA Would Do Anything To Sanction Russia Except Anything."

Alex Shephard in The New Republic discusses whether it's really all that likely that Putin was too scared to invade under Trump. (Answer: Oh please, go fuck yourself.)

Heather Cox Richardson discusses too: "Asked tonight what he would do differently than Biden in Ukraine, former president Trump answered: 'Well, I tell you what, I would do things, but the last thing I want to do is say it right now.'” (Substack)

People who aren't blaming Joe Biden for Putin invading Ukraine are blaming trans people. Rep. Clay Higgins is not the only one trying to whip his brains into a souffle.

And yet: Texas AG is laying the groundwork to take trans children from their parents, while rightwingers are the ones howling about "parents rights" because somebody might ask their kid her pronouns. This is terrifying. (The New Republic)

This man killed another man for throwing popcorn at him, and a Florida jury said that was a-okay. (CNN)

Sara Benincasa wrote a beautiful one for us all last year.

I have a memorial T-shirt. I cut the collar off and wore it to take an exercise lesson so that I live longer, with a better ass. I helped write an obituary. I went to a funeral on the Internet. I had a dream and in it you were still alive. I keep dyeing my hair. I don’t drink, especially when I want to.

Raise us up on eagle's wings Sara. Bear us on the breath of dawn. — "These Were Our Years," Medium

Fuk yeh disco drinks. (Liquor)

I choose "strawberry, mango and rose pavlova," which spring dessert do you choose? (You can scroll down instead of clicking through the slideshow.) (And yes, I subscribe to Better Homes & Gardens, what on earth has happened to my life?) — Better Homes & Gardens

Do your Amazon shopping through this link, because reasons.

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Rebecca Schoenkopf

Rebecca Schoenkopf is the owner, publisher, and editrix of Wonkette. She is a nice lady, SHUT UP YUH HUH. She is very tired with this fucking nonsense all of the time, and it would be terrific if you sent money to keep this bitch afloat. She is on maternity leave until 2033.


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