The Helpful Republican's Guide For Democrats

With Wednesday and Thursday night's Democratic presidential candidate debates out of the way, we face the new challenge of this presidential primary cycle: Republican strategists' helpful hints about who Democrats should pick as their nominee! So Let's get started!

We begin over at CNN's "State of The Union" with Jake Tapper Brianna Keilar and the CNN panel discussion with Republican strategist David Urban. Urban decided to grace the panel with his "take" on the Democratic primary field:

URBAN: So I will just say this. As long as we saw the same tone and tenure in those debates where everybody is trying to out-left each other -- right -- you heard -- you heard Mike Shields here on -- earlier today saying like, the middle -- the most -- middle America, they hear -- they listen to stuff and they're rolling their eyes going, what are you peopling talking about? Like, this -- this Democratic field cannot get further to the left of one another. And as long as that occurs, there is nobody up there that's going to beat Donald Trump, I promise you that.

Yes, yes, everyone's a flaming socialist now -- just like that socialist President Obama who so socialistly signed the Affordable Care Act aka Romneycare. Here's some "radical leftists" duking it out on immigration:

So while Trump is the most extreme end of GOP radicalism, they have been slowly moving that Overton Window to the point that a lot of today's leftist Democrat policies were right at home with 1980s Reagan, who is now also a leftist Democrat per the Republican strategists. CNN political commentator Jess McIntosh:

MCINTOSH: This erroneous idea that some of these policies that are being perceived or portrayed in the media as super lefty are actually enjoying really widespread -- 50 percent of --
URBAN: Listen, you're talking about eliminating insurance --
URBAN: -- eliminating insurance for all. Hold on, hold on. Let's just be -- let's be very factual.
MCINTOSH: No. Fifty percent -- 50 percent of Republicans are in favor of Medicare for All.
URBAN: Stop, stop. This is a network that believes in facts. Let's get rid of ICE. Let's have open borders.

When they imagine a "centrist" or "working class American" (**cough** white men ** cough), they mean everyone that will agree with moderate Republicans. Here Urban offers up to Bakari Sellers and Jess McIntosh the name of a Democratic candidate that might agree with him:

SELLERS: David, there is nobody --
URBAN: John Delaney --
SELLERS: There's nobody talking about --
URBAN: Craziness --
SELLERS: First of all when we talk about Medicare for All there is a role for supplemental insurance and most people -- (CROSSTALK)
URBAN: Not according to most of those candidates up there.
MCINTOSH: That's not true.

I mean ... c'mon! John Delaney???!!! This guy? No, he's not the person.

If you want to witness David Urban feebly try to make this case (while also really showing who they are truly afraid of **rhymes with Panama Paris**), watch the clip below:

Over on NBC's "Meet The Press," Republican Al Cardenas gave us his take on who Democrats should make the nominee after Chuck Todd brought up the latest David Brooks' column:

CARDENAS: I view this debate, Chuck, in the eyes of someone who was looking for a possible alternative to Donald Trump.
TODD: Somebody you want to support..
CARDENAS: Right. And so, who said things that I kind of liked? Amy Klobuchar. You know, Mike Bennet. Maybe even Congressman John Delaney. But, man, after the end of the two debates, I said to myself, "That stuff got nowhere." And so, yeah, there were a few things said that I could find an option for. But it didn't, man, it didn't make any ground.

This might be the most anyone has ever mentioned John Delaney's name. Same with Mike Bennet or Tim Ryan or the Other Tim Ryan. Thankfully, Democratic pollster Cornell Belcher was there to answer the David Brooks, Bret Stephens, and Al Cardenases of the world (while also answering why Biden is not THE ONE either):

CORNELL BELCHER: Because this, this annoys me to no end. Look, all respect to Brooks, we don't need you, right? We don't need you, right? We need to rebuild the Obama coalition, right? So, so when you talk about who's problematic -- and this is my problem with Joe Biden, my fear with Joe Biden that he's Hillary 2.0. Chuck, I sat in focus group rooms with younger voters, particularly younger voters of color. And they brought up the "superpredator" stuff with Hillary Clinton. And they said, "We cannot--" you know, they're not going to make the binary choice between the lesser of two evils. And I think the problem is Joe Biden becomes Hillary 2.0. We need a candidate who can inspire and bring back those young people and rebuild the Obama coalition, a majority coalition, back-to-back majorities built on young people and expanding the electorate. Not going back to the 1992 campaign again.

Watch the clip below for yourself:

This need for Republicans to tell Democrats who to select to beat Trump is best exemplified by Washington's second worst case of nepotism (after the Trump spawn), Meghan McCain:

Or perhaps this point will be better understood by Al Cardenas, and the rest, by one of their very own. So here ya' go, Al! Listen to your better (and smarter) half:

So until next time, remember this and have a week!

Ladybird has a lot of wisdomGiphy

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Michael Mora

Your friendly neighborhood Puerto Rican Political Freelance Writer for @wonkette. Pop Culture observer, Amateur Movie reviewer & Comics fan. Former Active Duty Marine. All opinions are mine only.


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