Her Name Is Hillary Clinton. Madame President If You're Nasty.
Basically the whole debate
The third and final presidential debate was an evisceration, a defenestration, an annihilation ... in other words Hillary Clinton delivered an ass-kicking to Donald Trump the likes of which we haven't seen since middle school. And there was one moment that's already become The Signature Moment of the debate, to the point that when Twitter and Facebook and probably Snapchat and Friendster and those olden timey people who make cave paintings saw it -- when Donald Trump called Hillary Clinton "NASTY" -- every single one of them rushed to make the exact same joke, based on that classic from the American songbook, Janet Jackson's "Nasty."
It happened, as most wild presidential debate moments do, in a discussion about the Social Security trust fund. Hillary was just saying words and facts and reasonable things, like she does ...
CLINTON: Well, Chris, I am on record as saying we need to put more money into the Social Security Trust fund. That's part of my commitment to raise taxes on the wealthy. My Social Security payroll contribution will go up as will Donald's, assuming he can't figure out how to get out of it, but what we want to do is --
She lobbed that little "wink wink nudge nudge" zinger about Trump getting out of paying more into Social Security, and Trump, seething at that point from over an hour of being beaten the fuck up by a girl, was UNABLE. TO. CONTROL. HIMSELF. So he interjected:
TRUMP: Such a nasty woman!
OOH BURN! GOOD ONE, DONALD! Hillary finished her answer and Trump, again, felt the need to interject, "Your husband disagrees with you," as if Hillary comes from Trump's bizarre little woman-hating world where that would matter. If Hillary had felt the need, she might have pointed out that it ain't matter what her husband thinks, she's the one about to be Madame President, and besides, she's smarter than Bill anyway, so eat it, Trump.
She didn't need to do that, though, because she was beating the shit out of him, in heels.
Earlier in the debate, Trump had another one of his little temper tantrum moments, when Hillz decided to tell America just what A Idiot Trump really is when it comes to WikiLeaks, Russia, and ISIS, pointing out that the reason Vladimir Putin would prefer a Trump presidency is that "he would rather have a puppet as president of the United States." Ohhhhhhh SHIT! Trump did NOT like that. Did Putin not call him "brilliant"? (He did, but the Russian word he used means more like "shiny." Putin did not call him smart.)
So Trump harnessed all his verbal powers and his quick wit and came up with ...
TRUMP: No puppet. You're the puppet!
If Donald Trump was an international laughingstock before this, we dunno what to call him now. We might have to make up a new word or phrase for somebody who sucks so much, but then crashes through rock bottom like a jackhammer to become more embarrassing and weak and sad than previously thought humanly possible. How about "Pulling a Donald Trump?"
Many other important things happened in the debate, and we'll talk about a few of them today at Wonkette. But for now, we'll just leave you with this ad Hillary Clinton's campaign has already released, of your next president, Nasty Hillary, comparing her 30 years of public service to Donald Trump's 30 years of WTF. She LOVES talking about this. Money quote:
And on the day when I was in the Situation Room monitoring the raid that brought Osama bin laden to justice, he was hosting "The Celebrity Apprentice."
She might as well have yelled "BANG" and made Trump roll over like a submissive yappy dog.
[debate transcript via Politico]
Evan Hurst is the managing editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.
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