truth in advertising

It's weird to watch a complete psychopath like Erick Erickson try to feign compassion. You can almost see his triple chin quiver with the sheer effort of it. You can see his piggish little eyes screw shut as he tries to squeeze an actual human emotion out of his facehole rather than a howling primal scream of entitled manbaby rage.

The man who gives all other Scandinavians with ridiculous double names a bad name pretended to give it the old college try and express some sort of regret over the Planned Parenthood shootings. He starts out...well, let's not say strong. You know those old ads for Brawny where it was a super awesome burly man paper towel and the other towel was a weak tea ephemeral towel that fell apart? That's pretty much Erickson's starting point, feigning-sympathy-wise.

This past Friday, a lunatic who lived in a shack with no running water or electricity killed three people in Colorado Springs, CO. He wound up going into a Planned Parenthood facility. Three people were killed. None of those were abortionists or patients. A pro-life Christian preacher/police officer was one of the victims.

Erick, Erick, Erick. Typically when one is trying to express sympathy with the victims, one doesn't quite so obviously point out that there is a class of people -- abortionists [sic because that is not really a fucking word] and patients -- that you do not really think of as deserving of sympathy were they the ones to have been gunned down in cold blood by one of your right-wing gun-fetishizing buddies.

Continuing with his subtle, almost delicate, approach to this discourse, Erick moves on to...call Cecile Richards a modern-day Joseph Mengele. Like you do. Then cue more rhetoric about how Planned Parenthood literally carved babies up, sauteed them, and ate them with a nice Chianti and some fava beans. HE HAS SEEN THE TAPES, PEOPLE.

It's always impressive that people like Erickson that otherwise just go all shruggie guy  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ over deaths, be they from lack of health care or cold-blooded gun fun murders, as just the cost of doing business and freedom and all that, are otherwise so attuned to the miracle of life before babby actually pushes its way out into the world.

Erickson doesn't miss the opportunity to get some Blue Lives Matter shit in here too, avoiding any real talk about the non-police officer victims while explaining that the loss of a Christian cop is the big tragedy here.

The pro-life movement is most typically represented by men like Garret Swasey, who though pro-life and Christian, worked as a police officer to save lives in Colorado Springs, CO. We should all be thankful for that. We should all be thankful the pro-life movement respects the rule of law even when the lawmakers and media do not respect them.

Urm. You people are terrorists that blow up clinics, murder people, and, on your best days, harangue people and block access to A LEGAL SURGICAL PROCEDURE. Not sure how that is "respecting the rule of law" but whatever.

In what might be the most terrifying paragraph of his screed, Erickson explains that we liberals had better thank our lucky stars that "pro lifers" are so well-behaved:

The left is desperate to compare the American pro-life movement to terrorists. They damn well better be glad Christians follow a faith that tells them to honor and pray for their leaders, follow the law, love everyone, and let the state and not the individual act as the sword bearer for God.

It is indeed a great comfort that rightwing Christians are mostly content with waiting for God to get His eternal revenge on us after we die, and that only a few of them feel the need to help us along to judgment more quickly.

We all thought we'd shame the Sons of Erick of the world by pointing out you can draw a direct line from their violent rhetoric to this gentle gun-stockpiling woman-abusing loner shooting up a clinic, but what we forgot is they have no shame. They're thrilled. Erick Erickson has been jacking off to the thought of clinics getting shot up since he learned how to touch his dick. He's not sad. He's not ashamed. He's thrilled.

Now you probably need to go steel wool your brain to get that image out of your head. Our deepest apologies.

[Erick On The Radio]