OH HEY FRIDAY! Just when we thought this was just going to be a super fucking shitty day with no good news, Robert Mueller dropped YET ANOTHER superseding indictment on top of Paul Manafort's ass, to go with his earlier request this week for Manafort's bail to be revoked.

We learned Monday night that back in February, after the last superseding indictment came down, Manafort and "Person A" (his lusty trusty Russian spy buddy/former business partner Konstantin Kilimnik) immediately got out their Obamaphones to sexxx-chat their co-conspirators in Europe and attempt to suborn perjury by gently suggesting those guys go ahead and lie to Robert Mueller about their foreign agent work in America. (The New York Times added more detail to that last night.) Since a primary condition of Manafort's bail agreement was DON'T FUCKING DO CRIMES, and witness tampering is a crime, Mueller filed to revoke his bail.

And now Manafort is getting more indicted, for committing more crimes! (Refresh your memory on all the other things he's indicted for RIGHT HERE.) And his buddy Konstantin Kilimnik got hisself a Robert Mueller indictment, which means the FAKE DEMOCRAT WITCH HUNT has found itself a new witch!

The new indictments are pretty simple. Look here:

As we explained the other day, Persons D1 and D2 are former business partners of Manafort and Kilimnik in Europe, who are also described by NYT as "veteran journalists." These are the folks those dumb fuckers started Snapchatting like "Hey bro! Hey bro! Feel like lying to Robert Mueller today? And maybe later we can Netflix 'n' chill? Bro! Bro!" So there's a count for obstruction of justice.


Conspiracy to obstruct justice! Because according to Mueller's evidence, Manafort and his Kilimnik (did we mention that's Manafort's RUSSIAN SPY BUDDY?) did some conspiring together when they coordinated their dumbfuck plan to poke their European pals on Facebook like "Bro! Bro! Do you even lift, bro? Let's lift weights after work and ALSO PLEASE LIE TO ROBERT MUELLER IN THE FOLLOWING MANNER. Bro! Bro-seph! Bro-cifer!"

And so on and so forth, because we are sure that is exactly how Paul Manafort and Konstantin Kilimnik talk.

In summary and in conclusion, it is time for Paul Manafort and his Russian buddy to GO TO JAIL. Also, while this news doesn't fully turn an entirely shitty news day around, it definitely helps a little bit.

Keep it comin', Bobby Three Sticks!

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[Superseding indictment]

Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the senior editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

Follow him on Twitter RIGHT HERE.

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Uh oh, looks like George Conway, husband of Kellyanne, is going to be sleeping on the couch for another week, because they are having That Fight They Always Have, the one where he says her boss (the president) is certifiably mentally unstable, and she's like "nuh uh," and we guess she reminds him that if that so-called certifiably mentally unstable person wasn't president, then she wouldn't be making a government salary for going on Fox News and lying to the American people.

It started this weekend with Donald Trump's latest Twitter rampage, which is still going on, and which avid watchers of Trump's Twitter habits agree seems to suggest that he is real upset about something. Like, more than usual. The sort of upset he gets when Robert Mueller is about to arrest his son, maybe. You know, ALLEGEDLY.

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Still no solution for shapeshifting trespassers

Hey, while every media outlet is doing exactly the same stupid horse-race political coverage they said nobody should be doing, the actual candidates for the Democratic presidential nomination are busily putting forward policy proposals -- the things pundits and voters keep saying they want to know about, at least in between discussions of "likeability" and whether Chuck Todd thinks candidates are bipartisan enough. So hey, here is a cool housing policy idea from Elizabeth Warren, who's trying to out-nerd everyone else with a proposal to make housing more affordable and even redress some of the nation's terrible legacy of housing discrimination. What a weirdo!

Warren outlines her housing proposals here, and we like 'em. There are even linkies to studies supporting her proposals, yay for info geeks! She notes that, for grownup adults, where you live (more precisely, where you can afford to live) has enormous consequences.

Housing is not just the biggest expense for most American families — or the biggest purchase most Americans will make in their lifetimes. It also affects the jobs you can get, the schools your children can go to, and the kinds of communities you can live in. That's why it's so important that government gets housing policy right.

Problem is, the federal government has spent decades getting housing policy very very wrong, from building racial discrimination into housing policy for much of the 20th century, to letting the big banks screw over homeowners and taxpayers as well. And of course, not doing much of anything to address the crunch in affordable housing for low and middle-income people. How's this for some real class warfare, via the supposedly invisible hand of the market:

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