We love a good excuse not to leave the house, especially ones that aren't court-ordered. So despite our concern about Washingtonians' weather wussiness, we're going to take the National Weather Services' advice to stay inside and hydrated. (Vodka is a liquid, right?) We're curious about how others are dealing and we hope that your solutions somehow involve getting out of work. We also predict that local news will "flood the zone" on this one -- watch for pictures of young people eating ice cream, playing in sprinklers and of office-workers walking around in improvised head gear. Also, it's totally possible that Sensenbrenner will melt.
But seriously, how insane is that? A heat-inspired orange fucking alert. Where are your global warming jokes now, assholes?
Oh, and there's an election in Virginia. Good luck with that. — WONKETTE
A Summer Swelter [WP]