C'mon, everybody knows Barack Obama bought 14 million guns since taking office: Whitey is everywhere! And it gives Obama the heebie jeebies. [True/Slant: F. Paul Wilson]

Michelle Malkin has clearly mistaken the preamble to the U.S. Constitution for one of John Yoo's S&M legal briefs. A common mix-up; they read pretty much the same. [Michelle Malkin]

Trailblazin' techie Robert Gibbs finally retired his MySpace and signed up for The Twitter. Just look at him go! He is an inspiration to press secretaries around the world. [The Caucus]

Steve Doocy leaked top secret TSA airport security protocol on national teevee. GOOD GOIN' DOOCY, TERRORISTS HAVE TIVO TOO! [Think Progress]

Mitt Romney gets his first taste of "coach" and oh boy, was it sour! [TPM]