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Congressional mama grizzly Michele Bachmann went on a radio show Thursday -- hosted bysome teenage friend of Andrew Breitbart's -- and revealed information about her past life as a martial arts mistress. "Hey, I took karate when I was 17 years old, I am dangerous," she told the youth, a precocious lad named "Ben Shapiro." And just how did Bachmann's karate-choppin' skills come up, exactly?


Because "Ben," who's apparently been watching too many violent Hollywood movies lately (don't tell his Mom, she'll ground him), fantasized out loud, on his radio program thing, about Bachmann kicking Obama's ass. "I think that you could probably beat up President Obama," he said. (Is Ben threatening the president with a "'dangerous' Michele Bachmann fighter-weapon"?)

If you hate yourself enough to listen to the full audio version of the interview, you will hear that Bachmann does not make any chuckle noises that might indicate she was just playin' about her mad fighting skills. She's being serious again!

She also says that Obama is in love with Hamas, that Teabaggers are just trying to "tell the truth about the madness," and unions are destroying the country with their negligent father-son inspector teams. And Obama needs to "man up" because it was "infantile" to blame BP for making the Gulf Coast oil geyser. "If the president wanted to, he could intervene and he clearly hasn’t," she said. "He’s not about taking responsibility."

Usually in Bachmann's world of gigantic federal police-state forces and census devil spies, government intervention is bad. But now it is good? So confused about what she wants! She must be a really hard person to buy gifts for. (Note to self: "Get Bachmann birthday gift card to the lumberyard/concrete block store, exchange policy req'd.")

To be fair, in this instance Bachmann is almost -- almost! -- out-terribleized by the youth Ben, who calls her "plainspoken, brilliant, and incisive," and many other very nice but totally untrue things. He kinda sounds "puppy lovey," even. (Seriously, don't listen to that interview, it is gross and will destroy your weekend.) [BigGovernment.com]

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Ann Coulter is not impressed with Donald Trump's presumptuous plan to stop ripping babies away from their mothers and sending them to infant prison. For quite a while, Ann has been obsessively lamenting the very idea that American people even have children to "fill their lives with joy," but now (lol, "now") Ann has shifted her rage to immigrant people. Every time you watch her waving her alien-length arms around in a ritualistic frenzy over how shitty liberals are, just remember that we have already seen the emptiness of her soul laid bare. Remember that time she wanted to eat your baby because you got a tax credit?

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Screenshot- Right Wing watch via Fox News
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It's just another Wednesday in an America that snatched kids from their parents and locked them up in old Walmarts. Trump just signed an unneeded executive order ending his heinous child separation policy, but his "the bad guy mobster in a mobster movie" tactics might've had some permanent damage. What remains of the shriveled-up soul of the grand old poor-screwing Republican party has finally had enough.

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