he is just terrificWe have all known forever that Donald Trump used to pretend to be his own spokesman, so he could brag about totally boning songstress and later French first lady Carla Bruni (Donald Trump did not bone Carla Bruni) and how Madonna was super up on his up junk (we have no idea if Madonna was super up on his junk), and other gross things that it might be indelicate for him to brag about himself. (He did anyway.) You know what? Let's treat ourselves to some Carla Bruni!

you'll be in your bunk

Back in the nineteen fucking nineties, he claimed pretending to be "Donald Trump spokesman John Miller" and/or "Donald Trump spokesman John Barron" was "a joke."

So even though we have all known forever that Donald Trump used to pretend to be his own spokesman, and Donald Trump admitted he used to pretend to be his own spokesman, the Washington Post is up with a big "scoop" today about how Donald Trump used to pretend to be his own spokesman.

(To be fair, they do have audio!)

So what does Donald Trump say? Nah mang. I never did it, and it was a long time ago when I did. Shame on you media vultures. Also, do you know what Bill Clinton did a long time ago?

"It was not me on the phone."@RealDonaldTrump speaks out on TODAY about 1991 audio released by @WashingtonPosthttps://t.co/09lrLQPYp5

— TODAY (@TODAYshow) May 13, 2016

If you don't care to watch Today Show "news" segments, let us extract the relevant part for you.

You're welcome.

[WaPo]