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Insane Anti-Abortion Activist Randall Terry To Face Obama In Primaries

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Our friend Randall Terry calls himself a Tea Party activist, and likes to go around protesting abortion with superb comic acting and the throwing of dead fetuses at tourist children, but he also apparently is going to face Obama in the 2012 Democratic primaries. This should be good.

Let's take a random sample of times this man has made it into our blog:

This past July, he hanged and beat Lindsey Graham in effigy. We made a Blingee.

For Halloween 2009, he made a video about how you are going to burn in hell in a deluxe fire condo with your roommates Nancy Pelosi and Harry Reid.

"Wonkette Went To Virginia For A Town Hall, And Randall Terry Went Nuts, The End"

His son outed himself as gay, haha.

And here is an ancient audio lithograph of him saying his favorite swear, "son of a pup."

But apparently this man is a Democrat now, for the fuck of it. We guess this unfunny music video about the Republican Party is supposed to explain his exit from the party. There is a giant sword in the background propped up next to a gumball machine. That's pretty much all you need to know.

While pro-life Democrats have prevailed at the state level, they have failed badly in their pursuit of their party’s presidential nomination in recent years.

Haha, this reporter is an idiot. Stop pretending this man is serious. How about pets? How often have gerbils won a presidential nomination? Some intern needs to do some research on this. [Sunshine State News via Ben Smith]

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Image: Dana Rohrabacher's office

The Associated Press finally called the race in California's 48th Congressional District late Saturday for Democratic challenger Harley Rouda, bringing an end to nearly 30 years in Congress for US Rep. Dana Rohrabacher. Over the years, Rohrabacher had represented not only his super-conservative Orange County district, but also the Taliban and Russia, and as his district has become more liberal -- or at least less frothingly rightwing John Birch Society-esque -- it was probably only a matter of time until his seat went blue. Rohrabacher's enthusiastic defenses of Donald Trump and of Vladimir Putin only hastened the swing this year. Too bad, so sad!

Let us bid a fond but not drawn out farewell to one of Congress's more spectacular idiots while we hope he's joined by many others, soon.

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HOLY WEEKEND NEWS DUMPS! While Donald Trump was across the ocean getting dunked on by Emmanuel Macron and skipping ceremonies for war heroes because he was scared his shithole hair would get messed up, journalists kept digging into the life and times of Trump's fake acting attorney general Matthew Whitaker, and DAMN. All's we know is that the Deep State must fuckin' HAAAAAAAAATE that guy, whose appointment was probably completely illegal and unconstitutional in the first place so why are we even talking about this.

We already knew bits and pieces about Matt Whitaker's scammy scummy fraud-y old gig, on the advisory board of a scammy scummy fraud-y company called World Patent Marketing, that did some MILD FRAUDS. When customers got mad, Whitaker would write them mean threatening letters. (You should read about how they "scammed US military veterans out of their life savings," as The Guardian puts it. Happy Veterans Day!)

What we didn't know -- and what one of the victims and also some other unknown people (deep state!) were more than happy to tell the Wall Street Journal -- is that FUCKIN' COMPANY IS UNDER FBI INVESTIGATION. And Whitaker was on the advisory board! And he made videos for the company! And he sent those mean threatening letters! What we're saying is that Whitaker is in deep.

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