Iowa Rep. Steve King Worried Transgenders Will Make Ladies' Armpits All Gross And Sweaty
What is he doing with his other hand?
Well shit, we keep thinking we've heard the weirdest, most shrivel-dicked explanation possible from a wingnut or a Republican lawmaker, for why trans people shouldn't be able to use the bathrooms that match their gender identities. This week, we had Sen. Jim Inhofe complaining about how the transgender agenda is being sprayed all over his Oklahoman neck. We've had all the insane wingnuts convinced that trans people in the potty means that YOUR WIVES AND DAUGHTERS are going to get raped. We had that lady running around Target talking about how it was literally SATAN who was going to rape the kids in the bathroom.
[wonkbar]<a href="http://wonkette.com/601955/sen-james-inhofe-wishes-transgender-folk-would-stop-peeing-all-over-his-neck"></a>[/wonkbar]But nobody yet has connected trans people taking a pee or showering at the gym (where they have privacy curtains, #GymFact) to a coming onslaught of lady armpits being all smelly like PEE YEW! This will happen, according to Rep. Steve King and radio host Simon Conway, because cisgender ladies won't ever shower at the gym anymore, which means they're always going to be running around in public like dirty sweathogs, forcing everybody to smell their lady stink.
Tell us what's gonna happen, boys:
CONWAY: I'm quite sure that my girls in their mid-twenties are driving home sweaty right now and taking [showers] at home, because they don't want to encounter [transgender people in gym showers].
KING: Well, and that will probably change our culture. We'll have a bunch of sweaty women around.
Oh God, we never thought of that! For the record, in this same interview, King calls for "civil disobedience" against Obama's call for all people to be able to use bathrooms and other facilities that match their gender identities, so we guess King will be civilly disobedient by ... NOT using the bathroom that matches his gender identity? Who's the weirdo now, HUH?
[wonkbar]<a href="http://wonkette.com/579011/mi-gym-tells-lady-bellyaching-about-trans-people-in-locker-room-to-shove-it"></a>[/wonkbar]But back to stinky armpits, maybe King is right, and alllllll the ladies will be glistening sweat monsters! Remember that lady who sued her local Planet Fitness after the gym canceled her membership, due to how she could not stop whining about how there was a "man" in the locker room? (It was a trans woman, obviously.) We bet her pits be STANKY these days! She probably doesn't even take showers at home, unless she's clearly marked her master bathroom as "NOT gender neutral!"
Or also, too, remember how dingbat Nevada Assemblywoman Michele Fiore explained how gym showers should work a while back on her radio show? Let's relive it:
I want to be in the shower with other girls and if you are transgender and you have a penis … I don’t feel like looking at your penis! Nor do I want you looking at my Va Jay Jay. So I don’t care if you want to have a Va Jay Jay, until you have a Va Jay Jay stay out of my nakedness area! That’s it.
Maybe Michele's cop boyfriend could report back to Wonkette, on whether she's even washing her armpits these days, because her "va jay jay" is panicked over the transgenders.
[wonkbar]<a href="http://wonkette.com/592788/nevada-rep-michele-fiore-has-girl-parts-on-her-nakedness-area-and-so-should-you"></a>[/wonkbar]Earlier in Steve King's interview, Conway asked him if transgenders are allowed in the congressional gym showers, and, though he admitted he isn't a "gym rat," he told a story about the good old days, when all the Congress boys could be nakey together:
This is a little-known thing ... there was not a reason to wear a swimsuit in the [congressional] indoor swimming pool, and so the men conducted themselves in the fashion like they did at most YMCA's all over America and didn't bother with the suits, until, I'm told, Bella Abzug was elected to Congress and she decided she wanted to swim. And she stepped up over the balcony of the swimming pool that was full of those men without suits and said, "All right, boys, I'm comin' down!" And they decided that they would wear suits from that point forward.
Steve King likes to stay at the Y-M-C-A, they have everything for congressional Republicans to enjoy, they can hang out with all the boys ... NAKED.
The rest of the interview is the same anti-trans claptrap you've heard over and over again, so fuck it.
Evan Hurst is the managing editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.
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