Jerks Boycotting Tim Hortons For Not Letting Them Put Children's Lives At Risk

Jerks Boycotting Tim Hortons For Not Letting Them Put Children's Lives At Risk

Conservatives are obsessed with the idea of victimhood.

They are deeply jealous of those who they see as benefiting from victimhood — frequently members of groups they have decided to oppress or target in some way. They see these people as getting not just empathy, but a certain kind of social capital and generousness that they themselves do not get. This is why they invent elaborate fantasies about "victim olympics"
and what have you.

Rather than just, I don't know, not picking out groups of people and trying to deprive them of their right to vote, control their bodies, have healthcare, be treated decently and fairly, not be discriminated against, conservatives try and come up with ways in which to frame themselves as the real victims of discrimination. And to their constant ire, it literally never works because everyone can see through their bullshit. And sure, they can pretend to give it to each other, but it doesn't really count unless they get it from us, the people who care about all of the people they treat poorly.

So it has been with this vaccination shit.

This time, they are boycotting Tim Hortons. Why? Is it because they haven't yet brought back the limited edition Justin Bieber Timbites — the Timbeibs? It is not. Is it because they've lobbied against minimum wage hikes and treat their employees terribly? It is because the Canadian donuts and coffee chain hosts a camp for underprivileged children ... and will be requiring that all who attend this summer be vaccinated so that the camp can be a safe place for immunocompromised children and also children who would rather not get sick with a virus we know can cause long-term complications. Yes, even in children.

It's also at least partly logistical, as a COVID outbreak would mean everyone would have to get sent home. Who wants that? Well, some people apparently.

"I've been reading that Tim Hortons won't be allowing unvaxxed underprivileged teens to attend camp this summer. What a joke." tweeted one asshole. "This is the entire point of camp: allowing kids to be a part of something amazing they've never experienced without discrimination."

The charge is being led by far-right Canadian media site Rebel News (you know, the one Gavin Whatsisface used to have a show on?), which has launched a petition and website demanding the camp allow unvaccinated children who they claim are being denied opportunities "discriminated against because of their medical status." That status being, of course, that they would be more likely to transmit a virus that no one wants to get.

Let Kids Camp! Tim Hortons Foundation Camps requires full vaccination from all, including campers!

They would apparently prefer that kids with a medical status that can't be changed simply by spending two seconds getting a vaccine be denied this opportunity instead.

On the bright side, given what we know about the way conservatives boycott things, they'll probably just buy piles of donuts and then film themselves throwing said donuts out the window, so if you can make it over to the WASPy part of town, you might be able to score some breakfast.

Of course is not about going to Tim Hortons Foundation Camps in particular. This is about a socioemotional need to feel like they come first, to feel like other people are willing to make sacrifices for them. It would just really mean a lot to them if people would say "You know what? It is worth the risk. YOU are worth the risk. It is more important that you feel good than it is for my own child or any other child to not get sick."

It would be great if they could get their self-worth from things other than oppressing people or trying to get other people to sacrifice for them, but given that they suck, that seems unlikely.

Do your Amazon shopping through this link, because reasons.

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Robyn Pennacchia

Robyn Pennacchia is a brilliant, fabulously talented and visually stunning angel of a human being, who shrugged off what she is pretty sure would have been a Tony Award-winning career in musical theater in order to write about stuff on the internet. Follow her on Twitter at @RobynElyse


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