They are just saying.

We mentioned Wednesday (1,000 years ago in Trump Time) that the president of the United States, during his normal morning poop 'n' tweet, said MSNBC's Joe Scarborough-Brzezinski should be fired from his job because of his little "unsolved mystery." Yep, that's just the president, accusing Morning Joe of murder. Totally normal.

In case you didn't know, in 2001, when Scarborough was a GOP congressman, an intern was found dead in his office. Many internets laughed at him at the time and a mild conspiracy theory was born, but it really didn't stick. The woman, 28-year-old Lori Klausutis, had an undiagnosed heart problem that caused her to become unconscious and fall, and the head injury from that fall is what killed her. At no point did anybody in a position to know anything about the case think anything was amiss:

Authorities determined 16 years ago that she died after losing consciousness from an abnormal heart rhythm and collapsed, striking her head. She was discovered in Scarborough’s office in Fort Walton Beach, lying on her back with her head near a desk, according to a 2001 police report.

The circumstances of Klausutis’s death on July 20, 2001, have prompted conspiracy theories — some of which appear to persist. But no foul play was suspected, and her death was ultimately ruled an accident by the medical examiner.

Great "unsolved mystery," Donald Trump, you dumbass. Next time tweet about the "unsolved mystery" of why baby comes out nine months after P goes in V, or the "unsolved mystery" of why macaroni and cheese is DELICIOUS.

Joe and Mika were not happy, and Mika read the statement they released on the matter Thursday morning on "Morning Joe." She explained she was reading it because she wrote it -- because do not fuck with her man, President Pussgrab -- and also because Joe is unwilling to respond to the president's idiot tweets. Here it is:

[Wednesday morning] the president crossed another deeply disturbing line with his attack on Joe. The chief law enforcement officer of the United States of America advanced a false conspiracy theory to intimidate the press and cause a chilling effect on the First Amendment. Joe and I are not intimidated. And his bizarre behavior contravenes both the Constitution and basic moral judgment. This is all we’re going to say on the matter.

And go fuck yourself, they did not add.

They added a bunch of other stuff, though, because this was a good opportunity to sound the alarm about a president who is becoming unhinged, whose brain might be literally eating itself from within, and who is hellbent on destroying everything this great nation stands for.

Enjoy this rant about how according to Scarborough's sources, the president has early stage dementia, he's on the verge of getting us killed, and therefore it's time for the cabinet to get off the toilet, be fucking patriots, and remove the asshole from office:

Long transcript but worth it:

JOE: He's completely detached from reality. We had a New York Times and Washington Post piece saying so a couple of days ago ... [I]f this is not what the 25th Amendment was drafted for ... I would like the cabinet members serving America -- not the president, serving America. You serve America and you know it. You know you don't serve Donald J. Trump, scam developer, scam Trump University proprietor, reality TV show host, you don't represent him. You represent 320 million people whose lives are literally in your hands and we are facing a showdown with a nuclear power and you have somebody inside the White House that New York Daily News says is mentally unfit, that people close to him say is mentally unfit, that people close to him during the campaign told me had early stages of dementia.

Now listen, you can get mad at me if you want to ...

MIKA: You can say that's not okay to say, but at this point it's reality.

JOE: When are we supposed to say this -- after the first nuclear missile goes, is that when it's proper to bring this up in polite society? Tell me. General Mattis, when is it polite to bring this up in polite society? Rex Tillerson, when is this the right time to talk about a mentally unstable president in the White House and a nuclear showdown with another unstable madman in North Korea? Is it after the first nuclear missiles fly? What exactly is the right time, Steve Mnuchin?

Mike Pence, guess what, Republicans want you to be president! The Republicans in the House and the Senate would love you to be president of the United States. You know why? Because you're stable.

And here's the thing. Everybody around Donald Trump knows he's not stable. Everybody around Donald Trump knows he's not stable. Everybody. And yet, this continues.

Say what you will about Joe Scarborough and Mika Brzezinski and their earlier cuddly relationship with Trump. (No seriously, say it, because it's valid.) But those rose colored glasses are off, baby.

Remember this summer when Trump was so hurt in his feelings hole by how mean Joe and Mika are, so he sicced the National Enquirer on them to do an "embarrassing story," then had his minions in the White House beg them to apologize to Trump in exchange for dropping the story? (The story was that they were dating. Now they are engaged!)

That was fucked up. We're so far past that now, and Trump is about to drive America off the cliff.

Article 25. NOW.

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[Washington Post]

Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the managing editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

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