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Joe Miller (Remember Him?) Leading Nevada (?) 'Stop Romney' Campaign

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Beloved welfare farmer and shaving opponent Joe Miller (R-Loser) finally has a political job! Don't worry, Ivy League Joe still didn't get elected to anything. Miller is just the chairman of some new Teabagger group dedicated to defeating the evil Mormon liberal elitist French-speaking Obamacare advocate from Taxachusetts, Mitt Romney. “In a matchup against Obama, Tea Party voters are looking for a consistent constitutional conservative," says Greasy Joe in some press release sent to Wonkette for some reason. "We will never get behind Mitt Romney. On issues like gun rights, gay rights, abortion, immigration, and health care, Romney has flipped more than John Kerry flopped.”


But Miller also hates Sarah Palin, even though she is the only Consistent Constitutional Conservative in World History, according to the Constitution, which she wrote. So who will be the teabagger candidate of choice? Herman "Mc"Cain? Arnold Sperminator? Chuck Norris? Larry Craig? Glenn Beck's timeslot on Fox News?

“As of right now, we’re not making an endorsement on who should be the Republican nominee,” said Executive Director Bryan Shroyer. “We just know that if Mitt Romney wins the nomination, we’ll be looking at a repeat of Bob Dole’s feckless 1996 campaign and a landslide defeat.”

ABM! Anybody But Mittens!

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It's the night before the two-night Democratic primary debate extravaganza, and we're already tired. Turns out having 20 candidates spread across two nights when only six or eight of them matter is not the must-see TV we all thought it was going to be! But that's not to dissuade you from getting excited! We're excited! We're so excited! We're so ...

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SCARED!

In case you need a reminder, here is how it's going to go down:

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Lately he's been blowing smoke from another orifice.

After a cursory examination of the TWELVE filings in the case against California Congressman Duncan Hunter just in the past 24 hours, we can confidently declare that that guy is a fucking idiot. The prosecutors have him by every last one of his short and curlies -- which is what happens when you use your campaign credit card to pay for hundreds of thousands of dollars of ski trips, video games, tuition, and plane tickets for the family rabbit.

A rational human being would have pleaded down a year ago and given up his congressional seat, since he could cash out and make a lot more money as a lobbyist anyway. But not Duncan Hunter! He made the federal government chase him down and document every last carton of cigarettes, round of tequila, and Uber ride of shame home from his many girlfriends' houses in a 60-count indictment filed last August. And still this dumb sumbitch refused to admit he was caught, even after his lovely wife (and co-conspirator) Margaret Hunter flipped on him this month -- which is what happens when you use your campaign credit card to carry on multiple affairs and you piss off the US Attorneys enough that they put every 7 a.m. Uber ride in your indictment.

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