Today, at last, the Senate officially confirmed Vanita Gupta to be the number three at the Justice Department, after weeks and weeks and weeks and weeks and weeks and weeks and weeks of us being subjected to Republicans being performatively opposed to her for good and well-thought-out racist reasons. The vote was 51-49, because Alaska GOP Senator Lisa Murkowski defected and joined the Dems.

But on the Senate floor this morning, Texas GOP Senator John Cornyn got up and very pissily told everybody that NOBODY on his side thinks this Vanita Gupta character is qualified, NOBODY. (Except Murk, apparently.) They don't like her and they think she sucks and did he mention they don't like her?

What a baby. What an ugly old fucking baby.


Cornyn has spearheaded the fight against Gupta, sometimes ridiculously so. He's called her the most "dangerous" of all the Biden nominees, ooooooooh spooky!

But why does he think she's so "dangerous"? Could it possibly be because one time Vanita Gupta made him look like the absolute goddamn fool he is?

A few weeks ago, Rachel Maddow told a story we weren't familiar with, about a big racist Drug War thing that happened in little bitty Tulia, Texas, when Cornyn was the attorney general of the state. You see, in July 1999, one racist undercover cop named Tom Coleman — an actual former rodeo cowboy — had ten percent of the Black population of that town arrested on drug charges. Did he have evidence? Nah, he just said they were all drug dealers. His "evidence" appeared to be that they were Black.

Seriously, he presented no evidence besides his testimony. The ACLU has more:

The arrests of 46 people, 39 of them black, resulted in 38 convictions for various drug charges with sentences of up to 90 years in prison. In early April 2003, a Dallas judge threw out all 38 drug convictions from Tulia because they were based on questionable testimony from a single undercover agent accused of racial prejudice. On June 16, 12 of the defendants remaining in the case (most of the others accepted plea-bargains in order to avoid lengthy prison sentences), were freed after Texas Gov. Perry signed a bill authorizing their release.

That's right, this was so bad that Rick Perry was like "y'all, this feels kinda racist to me? Let's go ahead and free all these people right quick."

More on just how much of a lying full-of-shit garbage human being Coleman was:

Perversely, in this "bucks-for-busts" world, Coleman was named Texas' outstanding narcotics officer in 2000. This is surprising since Coleman kept no written records, not a single photograph was taken, no video was shot, and no one observed his buys. Every ensuing conviction relied only on his word. The Texas judge who freed the defendants in June called Coleman "the most devious, non-responsive law enforcement witness this Court has witnessed in 25 years on the bench in Texas." According to the Court's findings, Coleman submitted false reports, misrepresented his investigative work, and misidentified various defendants during his investigation.

But he jailed a bunch of Black people, so for these racist Texans it was fun while it lasted, we guess.

And who gave Coleman that shiny Everything's Bigger In Texas branded dildo trophy for "outstanding narcotics officer" in 2000? Why, that would be then-Attorney General John Cornyn!

So how does Vanita Gupta factor into this? Oh, she was just the lawyer from the NAACP Legal Defense Fund who proved in 2003 that Coleman's entire drug bust was a racist scam, and that Coleman himself was a liar-under-oather, which led to Perry's pardons. She was like 29 at the time. And just three years after John Cornyn had knighted Coleman with the coveted magical Texas law enforcement dildo trophy!

Ms. Gupta [...] rose to prominence in 2003 when she proved that dozens of men, almost all of them Black, had been arrested on fabricated drug charges in Tulia, Tex. The narcotics agent behind those arrests, Tom Coleman, was found guilty of perjury and Rick Perry, then the governor of Texas, pardoned 35 people as a result of Ms. Gupta's work.

Gupta even referenced the story in her opening statement at her confirmation hearing, right there in front of Cornyn and in front of the other racist senator from Texas:

These are the same values that animated me in my first cases after law school, in a small town called Tulia, Texas. I was a young lawyer representing 38 people wrongfully convicted in a drug sting which led to then Governor Rick Perry pardoning them and a $6 million settlement. The Tulia exonerations helped usher in a new era of bipartisan criminal justice reform.

Oh yes she did say that right there where everybody could hear her.

How did that make yr dick feel, John?

Here's Maddow telling the whole story back toward the end of March. If you'll notice the picture on the YouTube, it is a younger John Cornyn standing next to the guy he really thought was deserving of the big honking Texas freedom dildo. (We keep saying that, but full disclosure, we don't actually know if Texas awards freedom dildos at its lawman of the year ceremonies.)

Vanita Gupta is insanely qualified. As Maddow noted, she — who Republicans are painting as a ginormous cop-hater — is supported by all the big law enforcement organizations, including even the Trump-loving National Fraternal Order of Police.

But Gupta is also a living reminder of what a shitty, dumb human being John Cornyn was and is, and what piss-poor judgment he's had the last however many decades. And there you see above, old crusty Senator Whine-Ass bitching and moaning about Gupta on the day at last, finally, confirmed.

So yeah. Gonna go with "nursing an old dick injury."

And the person what inflicted it is now officially number three at the Justice Department.

Reckon that hurts, John. Reckon that hurts.

[ACLU / New York Times / Gupta opening statement]

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Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the managing editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

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