Katherine Harris Makes Something Crazy Up

It's been, what, three weeks since we last ran this picture? (AP)

Do you realize it's been two weeks since our last "Katherine Harris seriously needs help" story? We're starting to get all shaky and unless we get an update, we'll start seeing beetles everywhere. Thankfully, the Orlando Sentinel's come through with our fix. Today's batshit crazy story, after the jump.

Katy, speaking at a Republican dinner, said:

"I've had Democrats in the House of Representatives come to me and say, 'You know, we'd really like to take the majority in the U.S. Senate' -- these are Florida Democrats in the U.S. Congress -- 'but you'll do so much more for us if you're there.' "

Harris said one Democrat -- "one of the most liberal House members from Florida" -- even offered her a slogan to use in her race against Nelson: "All about nothing for far too long."

Ah, yes. Of course. That makes perfect sense, yes. Who could've suggested that pithy, completely nonsensical slogan? Debbie Wasserman Schultz? ("That would be a big 'No.'") Alcee Hastings? ("He wishes Katherine Harris well in her life as a private citizen next year.")

Uh... Allen Boyd? Jim Davis?

Former Harris campaign manager Jim Dornan is convinced Harris invented the story.

It is so hard to find good help these days, isn't it?

The Sentinel switches on the sentimental music and takes us on a trip down memory lane to revisit some of Katy's greatest hits:

In the past, she has claimed the media doctored photos of her, described a nonexistent plot to blow up a power grid in Indiana and urged Florida scientists to treat citrus canker with a solution that turned out to be water.

She has also:

We just want to put this all in one place for the ease of the next reporter assigned to write up some crazy shit she says. In fact, if you're writing such a piece, make sure you:

  • Use some variation on the term "increasingly bizarre behavior."

  • Quote (on the record and by name) Ed Rollins and/or Jim Dornan and/or other former campaign managers/chiefs of staff/press people.

  • Mention how concerned Jeb Bush is.

  • Mention her consistently bizarre wardrobe.

  • Make vague reference to "mocking beltway pols."

  • Quote Katherine saying something, followed immediately by non-crazy person saying something completely contradictory.

There you go. No need to thank us, we're just doing our job.

Democrats are for me, Karris Says [Orlando Sentinel]


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