You might think the White House would want to make like a common GOP senator right now and duck and cover from Trump's latest batshit senile conspiracy theory tweets about 75-year-old Catholic peace activist Martin Gugino. After all, Axios did report this morning that they are "at their wits' end" over that tweet, and starting to wonder if Trump even wants to be re-elected. (Of course he does. He just doesn't want it to happen fairly, and he doesn't know how stupid he is, so he thinks he's helping himself, by creating imagination stories about Gugino being an antifa-trained super-spy.)

But not Kayleigh McEnany! Nobody thought she'd really set herself apart as press secretary — she is a shameless fucking liar, tell us how that makes her special in the Trump administration — but she's doing it, because she has so little self-respect, so empty a soul, that she's actually willing to say with a straight face that Trump is just asking normal questions, like for instance when he accuses Joe Scarborough of murder. Sarah Huckabee Sanders would at least attempt a C.J. Cregg sometimes with Trump's batshit, and just say she didn't have any updates on that particular batshit thing.

Not McEnany.

So when Trump accused the 75-year-old Catholic peace activist, who is still in the hospital after the Buffalo police kicked the shit out of him and made his head bleed, of being an "ANTIFA provocateur." McEnany was ON IT. She always is when she's dealing with subject matter that comes from Trump's favorite clearinghouse for batshit QAnon-grade conspiracy theories, the One America News Network (OANN).

She appeared on the "Fox & Friends" morning idiot breakout session, and she said Trump was just asking very good questions:



BRIAN KILMEADE: So yesterday, the president, Kayleigh, tweeted out that this Buffalo protester, the 75-year-old who was shoved to the ground by a police officer, might have been part of antifa, and a provocateur, in order to get that type of reaction, just to paraphrase. Could you expand on that? Does the president think this guy is part of antifa?

MCENANY: So, the president was raising questions based on a report that he saw. There are questions that need to be asked and every case we can't jump on one side without looking at all of the facts at play. This individual has some very questionable tweets, some profanity-laden tweets about police officers. [...]

We need the appropriate amount of force used in any interaction, but there are a lot of questions in that case.

Hahahahahahahahaha, fuck off.

OK, so to recap, McEnany needs us to know that:

1) Donald Trump saw a "report." (from the One America News Network, which is not actually a news network, but which does spew a lot of Russian propaganda, especially from the "reporter" who did this "report," who used to literally work for Russian state-owned media!)

2) And because Trump saw a "report" from that very valid "news network," there are "questions that need to be asked." Obviously! Trump is never outright accusing, he is just asking questions! Rush Limbaugh admiringly explained recently how Trump is very "clever" when he shitposts propaganda like this. It was revealing of how dead inside both Limbaugh and Trump really are.)

3) ALSO DID YOU HEAR MARTIN GUGINO'S MOUTH IS A BIG CUSSYPOTTY? Kayleigh McEnany needs the Fox News morning audience to know this.

McEnany also said that an important question that needs to be asked about this is why all those cops resigned from the emergency response team, because we guess "because they're fucking assholes" isn't the answer she wants you to arrive at. There must be something to Trump's antifa conspiracy theory!

We should note that there is a possibility this strategy came from inside the White House, and not just from inside Trump's brain and itchy Twitter fingers. They actually might want this fight. Why would we say that? Note that "provocateur" is both used and spelled correctly in the initial tweet:

That's a really big word for him.

So it may be true that some in the White House are horrified by this, like Axios reported. It may also be true that other super-geniuses in the White House think they've found a golden turd to play with.

It's a stupid strategy, of course, because as the best tweet on the internet explains this week, this is literally the conspiracy theory Trump is pushing:

But y'all, Donald Trump and the average Fox News viewer aren't smart enough to see how dumb the conspiracy theory is. They're too busy shitting their pants and then wondering what's that smell.

Also, since the "antifa" threat Trump, Bill Barr and Fox are pushing is mostly imaginary -- y'all hear that Barr's Justice Department still hasn't found any antifa in the cases it's brought stemming from the protests? It's not like they're not looking -- they gotta try SOMETHING.

So yeah. This is their play. It's a very dumb play, but it's the only one they got.

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Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the senior editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

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