Kellyanne Conway, You Are No Bob Dylan. Or Even The INXS Guy (RIP)

Dignity of the presidency: Restored!


Kellyanne Conway took to the Sean Hannity Propatainment program Wednesday evening to explain why it's definitely no big deal that Donald Trump Jr. acknowledges he'd taken a meeting with a Russian government lawyer, after being told that the Russian government would like to please conspire to help his daddy win. And at the end of the "interview," she had a clever little visual aid!

This is how I see it so far. This is to help all the people at home. What’s the conclusion? Collusion? No. We don’t have that yet. [crosses out "collusion"] I see illusion and delusion.

So just so we’re clear, everyone: four words. Collusion, no. Illusion, delusion, yes. I just thought we’d have some fun with words. A Sesame's Grover’s word of the day, perhaps, Sean.

Because we love you and are willing to suffer on your behalf, we watched the full interview, too, so you won't have to; in it, Conway repeated the now-standard What About Hillary And The Ukrainian Government? line, because as we all know, Ukraine hacked several states' election systems, broke into the computers of the Republican National Committee, and unleashed an online assault of pro-Clinton trolls and botnets.

She also praised Don Jr. for his sincere, 100% transparent appearance on "Hannity" Tuesday, in which he said yeah, maybe if he had it to do over again, he might do things differently if a foreign government agent offered to help with an American election. Conway had a real zinger ready to go for that:

I think many people in last year's election should say that they would've done thing differently. How about the people saying on election day Hillary Clinton had a 92 percent chance of winning Michigan? Turns out she had a zero percent chance! Many things could be done differently.

How true this is. Conspiring with a foreign government to subvert an American election is exactly the same as an inaccurate probability estimate (also, we're not going to look it up, but we're pretty sure no one predicted Michigan at 92%). But if we had it to do over again, we probably would have preferred a smarter electorate that wasn't driven by the desire to kick out all the Muslims and Messicans, and that wouldn't think Kellyanne Conway's little "Here's yer sign" trick was terribly clever, for instance.

Still, at least it generated some parodies:

Also, we have to say we were disappointed that people on the Twitters were reminded more of Andrew Lincoln's creepy stalker who was supposed to be charming in Love, Actually than of Bob Dylan's "Subterranean Homesick Blues," which is another thing we'd change if we had it to do over again.

Oh, and Kellyanne? Mr Dylan has YOUR sign:

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[Fox News on YouTube / Cnet]

Doktor Zoom

Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.

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