Kevin McCarthy Real F*ckin' Bad At This, January 6 Commission Edition!

Sometime this afternoon the House is set to vote on establishing a bipartisan commission on the January 6 attack on the Capitol by Donald Trump's terrorists. Yesterday, House Minority Leader Kevin McCarthy announced that Kevin McCarthy HATES THE IDEA, even though Kevin McCarthy deputized GOP Rep. John Katko to work with Democrats to come up with the proposal, and even though the GOP pretty much got everything it asked for. In the likeliest of realities, Kevin McCarthy hates it because Kevin McCarthy might have to honestly testify about what Kevin McCarthy knew and when Kevin McCarthy knew it about Kevin McCarthy's phone calls with Donald Trump that day.

Of course, the other real reason Kevin McCarthy doesn't want the commission is because his real dad Donald Trump is beached on a golf course somewhere whining about it. Last night, Trump argle-bargled into his free WordPress blog that "Republicans in the House and Senate should not approve the Democrat trap of the January 6 Commission" and expressed his hopes that "Mitch McConnell and Kevin McCarthy are listening!"

Well surprise, Kevin McCarthy is a really shitty leader, and it's going to pass the House, apparently with much more GOP support than "Mean Liz Cheney." Punchbowl News reported in its newsletter this morning that "dozens of rank-and-file Republicans were telling their leaders they were inclined to side with Katko and House Democrats, and against McCarthy, in a stunning rebuke of the California Republican's leadership." This, despite how McCarthy is reportedly behind the scenes furiously trying to keep members from voting for it. The bipartisan House Problem Solvers Caucus, which Katko is part of, endorsed the legislation for the commission last night. Obviously those Republican members really hold McCarthy's authori-tah in high regard!

We'll see what the final tally ends up being.

But what happens when the bill gets to the Senate? Well, apparently Mitch McConnell is inclined to do what Trump wants, but not because Trump wants it. (Mitch McConnell only does things for his own self-serving reasons.) McConnell announced this morning on the Senate floor that he officially opposes it. Axios reported last night that McConnell doesn't like the bill as it currently stands, telling Republican senators that "There's 41 of us who could change this, and I think we should." He's "pushing the pause button" on the bill, he said after a Senate GOP lunch.

Politico Playbook reported this morning that McConnell's problems with the bill stem from hahahahaha, you don't fucking care what McConnell's problems with the bill are. Just know that he's being a dick and whining about various and sundry things.

And speaking of Senate Republican dicks, you will want to hear what Senate's Dumbest Republican Ron Johnson thinks about the idea for a commission to investigate the January 6 attacks:

"I hope no Republicans in the House vote for this," Johnson said. "I hope nobody in the Senate embraces it either."

He called it "A FARCE." On Fox News, Johnson said the real person who needs to be held accountable for January 6 is NANCY PELOSI, because NANCY PELOSI is "ultimately responsible for the security of the Capitol," adding that "if there were security lapses, and there were, she needs to be held responsible as well." And she can't be ultimately held responsible if she gets to pick the staff members for the commission!

Reminder: Ron Johnson has previously said of the January 6 attack that he wasn't scared that day because the terrorists weren't Black. Oh, he tried to dogwhistle it slightly more than that, but that's the essence of what he was saying. Before that, he read into the Senate record a batshit Federalist article suggesting that the insurgent terrorist siege, which we know with 100 percent accuracy was committed by Trump supporters who had bought into Donald Trump's Big Lie about a stolen election, was actually committed by "provocateurs" and "fake Trump protesters."

But sure, tell us about how we need to hold Nancy Pelosi accountable.

By the way, Thomas Kean and Lee Hamilton, the co-chairs of the 9/11 Commission, endorsed the 1/6 Commission today.

So it seems appropriate at this point to say that anybody who doesn't vote for this thing is on the terrorists' side.

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Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the managing editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

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