Funny she should mention it.

Seems like the whole darn Trump clan (we'll use that with a "c" this time) was in the media today yapping about immigration. Don, the Don, was retweeting rightwing fearmongering about border-crossing murderers, while Fox News explained Jared Kushner is working on a "comprehensive immigration reform" plan that has TWO comprehensive points: both "Border Security" and "Legal Immigration."

We are reminded of Steve Martin's simple plan for having a million dollars without ever paying taxes: "First, get a million dollars..."

Meanwhile, on Fox Business, Lara Trump, Eric's wife, was invited to Stuart Varney's program for three minutes and 35 seconds. She was billed as responding to Hillary Clinton's op-ed on the Mueller Report (which Evan translated for you here) but after two minutes of Trump explaining Clinton did not win and her opinion is therefore irrelevant, Varney moved on to the extremely important topic of "the mother of all caravans," which will surely overwhelm America even worser than the other caravans that completely overwhelmed America.

Over a repeating video loop showing a vast sea -- or at least hundreds -- of brown people walking along highways in Mexico, Varney said it's perfectly reasonable to change the asylum laws, noting that after all, they let people ask for asylum and how is that even fair? Ms. Trump made the mandatory joke about how Democrats must surely want "all of these illegal immigrants" running loose in their sanctuary cities, then Varney pointed out the ominous parallel to how Europe has been overrun by refugees, SWARMS of refugees INFESTING a once-proud continent:

That videotape reminds me of what happened in Europe, when there was a march across Europe by a million people who wanted to get into Western Europe, Angela Merkel let 'em in! Open borders, let 'em in. Catastrophic!

Lara Trump agreed it was just about the worst thing possible, especially since Germany is now dead:

It was the downfall of Germany, it was one of the worst things that ever happened to Germany. This president knows that, he's trying to prevent that from happening here.

Maybe Congress could "get its act together and do the right thing for the American people," she concluded.

Like maybe mandating that modern European history be taught, perhaps. Seems to us Germany has some very useful lessons to teach about what happens when a crowd of nationalists dehumanizes a despised minority!

Just another very regular day at Fox Business, where on Tuesday Lou Dobbs hosted a dude named "Christian Whiton" (We Swear We Are Not Making That Up), who recently repeated the very "replacement" tag line shared by the Charlottesville Nazis and the New Zealand mosque shooter.

Speaking of Democrats and their evil compassion for asylum seekers, Dobbs explained Dems are blind to the dangers of immigration "crisis," since to Dems, "It is the arrival of highly targeted, highly prized and appreciated future voters for the Democratic Party."

Christian White One, who's with the "Center for the National Interest," agreed it's all part of an ingenious plot:

That's right, and we've seen this in Europe, we're seeing it here, and they are attempting to replace us with citizens that they think -- future citizens that they think would be more amenable to voting for them.

Fortunately, he noted, the GOOD Latinos are far smarter than that, and would never vote for Democrats.

In other news, America's historians all quit in disgust, the end.

[Fox Business / MediaMatters]

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Doktor Zoom

Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.

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Once upon a time... about ten years ago, a group of entirely ridiculous men burst onto the scene wearing stupid hats and telling men that wearing stupid hats and telling men that walking up to women in bars and insulting ("negging") them would get them laid. This did not last long, as women also had televisions and computers and were completely aware of these tricks as well, so when some ass came up to us in a bar and said "Hey, nice nails, are they real?" we would laugh and laugh and loudly announce "Oh my god, this guy just tried to neg me! Can you believe that shit? HEY EVERYONE, THIS GUY JUST TRIED TO NEG ME!" and then refer to him as "Mystery" the whole night.

Most of the men who tried that shit only did so a few times before realizing that it wasn't going to work, and thus moved on to other things. Perhaps things that did not involve furry hats and coming off as a huge creep. We may never know, because I would assume that those who tried it are now extremely embarrassed and would never, ever admit to this to us.

Still, there were a few men willing to eat that shit up, as well as some grifters willing to take advantage of that. Said grifters tended to be extremely misogynistic and seemed more like they were teaching men how to be as despised by women as they were than teaching them how to actually be liked by women.

Some of them, like Roosh V, a creepy weirdo who actually does live in his mom's basement, actively encouraged men to rape women who were intoxicated to the point of being obviously unable to consent.

However, even that branch of the PUA tree is wilting away. Many "self-help" style PUA forums like Nextasf and RSDnation are shutting down or have already shut down. In March, Chateau Heartiste, a batshit crazy PUA turned White Nationalist/Alt-Right blog was shut down by Wordpress. This week, rape advocate Roosh V (whom you may recall once called yours truly a "Wonkette typist/clown face, would not bang") announced that he was renouncing his PUA ways and devoting himself to Jesus. He explained to the forum he manages that he would no longer be allowing anyone to discuss premarital "fornication."

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'Baby Geniuses' star Jon Voight took to Twitter early this morning to proclaim his undying love for Donald Trump, probably because there is no one left in his life who will listen to him talk about this, or anything else, in person. In this video rant, Voight encouraged members of the Republican Party, whom he apparently thinks are the only real citizens of the United States, to stand by Donald Trump and "acknowledge the truth" that he is the best President since Abraham Lincoln.

Part ONE:

People of the Republican Party, I know you will agree with me when I say our president has our utmost respect and our love. This job is not easy. For he's battling the left and their absurd words of destruction. I've said this once and I'll say this again. That our nation has been built on the solid ground from our forefathers, and there is a moral code of duty that has been passed on from President Lincoln. I'm here today to acknowledge the truth, and I'm here today to tell you my fellow Americans that our country…

Oh no, not our absurd words of destruction!

Part DEUX:

is stronger, safer, and with more jobs because our President has made his every move correct. Don't be fooled by the political left, because we are the people of this nation that is witnessing triumph. So let us stand with our president. Let us stand up for this truth, that President Trump is the greatest president since President Lincoln.

Does Jon Voight not know there have been... other presidents? Can he name them? Because really, it does not sound like it. Does he also not know that a very big chunk of the Republican Party actually does not care very much for Abraham Lincoln? Namely those defenders of Confederate statues that Trump called "very fine people?" Also, did he intentionally diss their beloved Ronald Reagan?

Who can know? Who can even tell what he is trying to say or why he is trying to say it. He doesn't appear to have tweeted much since 2016, so I'm guessing whoever's job it was to keep him from tanking his career quit. Either that... or after filming the seventh season of Ray Donovan, he found out it's going to be canceled or his character is getting killed off or something and he is now free to be a jackass? I don't know, I haven't watched the show, although my parents are very into it and mad that I haven't watched it. Literally all I know about it is that it has something to do with Boston, because they keep mentioning that to me like it's a selling point.

It seems useless at this point to note that the people who scream their faces off about how bad it is for Hollywood celebs to support liberal causes, and how they should keep their politics to themselves, etc. etc. make a way bigger deal than normal people do whenever a Big Time Hollywood Celebrity like Jon Voight or, uh, Scott Baio, supports their cause. Mostly because they're the only ones who have elected a reality TV star and the star of Bedtime for Bonzo (who by the way, also once practically ruined a perfectly good Bette Davis movie with his bad acting. Which is not to say that Dark Victory is not fantastic and probably the best thing to watch if you want to sob your face off, but he was very bad in it.) to run the country.

But we might as well do that anyway, because it actually never stops being funny.

[Jon Voight Twitter]

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