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Levi Johnston Working Diligently To Preserve His Market Value

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Comical naked person Levi Johnston went on the CBS program this morning but really, don't even watch the clip, we just needed some art to go with the text: "There are some things that I have that are huge. And I haven't said them because I'm not gonna hurt her that way... You know, I mean, if I really wanted to hurt her, I could, very easily. But there's -- I'm not gonna do it. I'm not going that far."

Blah blah blah Levi, you massive slut. Just be an adult here and name your damn price. Or don't! Hold out for a little while longer. We imagine his "endgame" preference is to reveal these things in a ghostwritten New Yorker "Talk of the Town" two-pager, alongside a comic of him shootin' bunnies while takin' a dump.

Levi: I'm Hiding "Huge" Things About Palin [CBS News]

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