We Guess We Should Say Something About This 'Lady G' Business

If you spent any time on the internet this weekend, whether you were on Twitter or Etsy or Sea Captain Date Dot Com, you probably heard about "Lady G." And you probably heard about little ladybugs. And if you didn't hear about little ladybugs, consider yourself fortunate.

If you have no idea what we are talking about, here are the basic details: Sean Harding, a gay porning star of sexual gayness, sent out a tweet rallying the gay escorting community to jump together to out a certain homophobic Republican senator, whose initials are "LG":

And the stories started flying, and before you knew it, "Lady G" was the top trending thing on Twitter, apparently so-called because that is literally what escorts call this Republican senator, allegedly! A Medium post was published and then unpublished, and in that story Lindsey Graham called the hairy moles in his B-crack his "ladybugs" and anyway, it was complete satire, which should have been obvious, because it was too perfect.

And now, according to Harding, there are other people who want to come forward, but they're trying to make sure they do it the right way — there seem to be NDAs involved, allegedly — and Harding himself has decided he's not going to comment any further right now, because apparently there have been death threats, both against him and against his family. That's fucked up.

The only reason we wanted to address this at all is to MAKE SURE everybody knows that, if this happens, if the story breaks in a real news outlet with real receipts, that it is TOTALLY FINE to out "LG," whoever he may or may not be. Outing, as Wonk pal Dan Savage tweeted this weekend, is a "brutal tactic that should be reserved for brutes," adding that "Lady G more than qualifies."

The rules of outing are pretty simple, and it so happens we have them handy, from when we wrote them out when Aaron Schock outed himself by tuggin' peen at Coachella:

The rules of outing are real fuckin' simple: Don't do it. Unless you are dealing with a person who has spent their active public life hurting LGBT people, working to deny them rights, working to make them feel unloved and unwelcome in the Church, or anything else you can think of that fits under the heading of GLARING FLAMING FUCKING HYPOCRISY, and who has done nothing to apologize or take responsibility for that. In that case, OUT AWAY!

Simple as that.

If "LG"/"Lady G" is who we all think it is — Senator LEWIS GRABBYBOTTOMS of New Hampshire, obviously, fuck that guy — then he absolutely deserves to get outed, if these rumors are in fact true. His record on LGBTQ issues is atrocious.

Charlotte Clymer tweeted a whole thread on his record, which you should read, but here is one highlight, when Lindsey Graham came out in support of literally amending the Constitution to ban gays from marriage, in 2004:

The traditional institution of marriage is now under attack. [...] If we don't act, it's only a matter of time until marriage as we have known it will be redefined.

Uh huh.

Moreover, Graham used to correctly say out loud that Donald Trump is a "kook," and that if Republicans nominated Trump in 2016, they'd get "destroyed" and would "deserve it." But then he turned on a dime one day after a golfing excursion with Trump, and now he's such a slobbery suckup, we actually (almost) get embarrassed for him when he starts scream-yelping in service of Dear Leader. Lord, did you see how he debased himself last week responding to General Mattis's comments about Trump? It was so gross and pathetic.

Here's a good ad about Graham selling his soul to Trump, using nothing but Lindsey Graham's own words.

Several theories have been presented as to why Graham made such a jarring switch. There's the "pilot fish" theory from never-Trumper Steve Schmidt, which says Graham is literally a pilot fish, "a smaller fish that hovers about a larger predator, like a shark, living off of its detritus." When John McCain died, Graham's center of power died, and so he had to find a new predator to follow around and suck on their leftover bones.

Some have also wondered if the Russians hacked his emails (they did!) and WikiLeaked them to Donald Trump. The problem we saw with that theory is, like, what the hell did the Russians find? Stuff that's been rumored in Washington since, oh, FUCKING FOREVER? Because trust us, that would not be the finest kompromat the Russian intelligence services ever did, if so. Nobody out there would be like "WHAT? Do you mean to say ... WHAT? Surely you have been having too many Jamesons with Dana Bash and don't even know what you are saying!"

But we do guess adding an ESCORT SCANDAL to it could be a bit more hairy, you know, assuming there are receipts.

Regardless of why Graham switched his allegiance away from America and toward Trump, the fact remains that Trump is the most dangerous president for LGBTQ people of our lifetimes, just like he's the most dangerous president for all other Americans of our lifetimes. Graham's actions defending Trump hurt people.

So yes, it's fine to out him, if the rumors are in fact true. (It doesn't mean you can make gay jokes in the comments, unless you are a gay, in which case try to at least make them creative.)

Obviously, there's nothing wrong with it if he's gay. (So are we!) It's not about that. And there's nothing wrong with sex work either, to be clear, as Wonk pal Lizz Winstead hilariously explained on Twitter:

In summary and in conclusion, remember that time Lindsey Graham was running for president (LOL) and said that since he is a confirmed bachelor, his sister and other ladies could just take turns being the "rotating first lady"? That was awesome.

Anyway, donate to Jaime Harrison, who's running against Graham this November. According to a recent poll, they are in a dead heat.

And while we'd hate for Graham to lose even partially because it turns out that he really for real is "Lady G," just kidding we can't finish typing this sentence because we don't give two flying fucks why he loses, just as long as he loses.

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Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the managing editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

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