Barack Obama is about to finally do that thing his campaign has sort of been implying he's already pretty much done: Crawl ahead of Hillary in Actual Delegates. Yes he could, or something! Let's watch the National Media totally ignore DC's primary -- what, nobody could afford exit polls for DC? -- as we liveblog the current 9/11, which is the bad weather and ice-related traffic accidents in Maryland.

8:25 PM -- Really, Shepard Smith said the traffic in Maryland was the worst since 9/11. We are digging up the video.

8:26 PM -- McCain and Huckabee have a bit over a thousand votes between them with 47% of the precincts reporting. This would be a good time to say, "Congrats, Ron Paul, you and your 4% finally decided a primary election."

8:28 PM -- But Mitt Romney, who quit the race, is running even with Ron Paul in Virginia tonight, so we could also say it about Mitt Romney.

8:29 PM -- Hillary is now ahead by five delegates.

8:30 PM -- But the "Super Delegates" may "Super Fuck Her Over" at any moment, which could happen tonight.

8:34 PM -- CNN calls Virginia for McCain! Walnuts has all of 2,500 more votes than Reverend Mike at the moment. This is a really lame win for the oldest man to ever lose to a Democrat in '08.

8:41 PM -- In honor of this great failure of American Feminism, we're making our token female Wonkette editor liveblog the Hillary speech, which is about to start!