Yesterday, Wonkette had a post on the GOP war against Liz Cheney, currently the third-highest ranking Republican in the House, whom they all hate so much you'd think she had personally done antifa canceling to Mr. Potato Head.

In that post, GOP leaders such as Rep. Steve Scalise were saying things like, "This idea that you just disregard President Trump is not where we are, and, frankly, he has a lot to offer still," in response to Cheney having the utter audacity to state that Mitch McConnell and Kevin McCarthy (not Trump) are the leaders of the Republican Party.

Rep. Jim Banks, who has his eye on becoming the new Liz Cheney if they oust the current Liz Cheney from her House leadership position, suggested she's just not being a team player, saying, "I think a lot of us would like to see her join the team, be on the same team, same mission, the same focus. And at this point, that's what many of us are questioning."

And what is that mission? What is the focus? Pretending Donald Trump REALLY won the election that he lost and catering to his every wish and demand, obviously. Or as it was put by Rep. Anthony Gonzalez, who like Cheney voted to impeach Trump, "If a prerequisite for leading our conference is continuing to lie to our voters, then Liz is not the best fit." Touche.

After all yesterday's reporting came out, Liz Cheney kicked 'em in the nuts some more, because she is just clearly through with it.

She had this to say on Twitter:

TEXT: "The 2020 presidential election was not stolen. Anyone who claims it was is spreading THE BIG LIE, turning their back on the rule of law, and poisoning our democratic system."

It continues to amaze us that we are technically on Liz Cheney's side here; the 2020s are fuckbonkers weird, y'all. But we are glad to see Cheney using the exact same terminology against Trump's and the GOP's fascist bullshit as anyone else would.

As CNN notes, Cheney's tweet was in response to a typically batshit statement from Trump, who declared on Monday as if he was HEREBY ORDERING it that, "The Fraudulent Presidential Election of 2020 will be, from this day forth, known as THE BIG LIE!" Sure buddy, try to steal the thing we've been saying for seven months. See how that works out.

Cheney went on with even stronger words, speaking yesterday at a GOP conference in Sea Island, Georgia.

"We can't embrace the notion the election is stolen. It's a poison in the bloodstream of our democracy," Cheney said, speaking behind closed doors at a conference in Sea Island, Georgia. "We can't whitewash what happened on January 6 or perpetuate Trump's big lie. It is a threat to democracy. What he did on January 6 is a line that cannot be crossed."

A poison. We can't whitewash the domestic terrorist attack incited by Donald Trump. We cannot tell his big lie. Yeah, strong words.

And the Republican man-idiots are now MORE MAD!

"Her fellow GOP leaders are privately done with her," Punchbowl News reported this morning in its newsletter, which also shared that they've decided that when they rid themselves of this terrible woman who won't even help them steal elections or usher in fascism, they have to pick a woman to replace her. Punchbowl says they're floating names like Nancy Mace (new GOP idiot) and Elise Stefanik (even bigger idiot) and others as possibilities. (Warmest regards to Jim Banks, who is a man.)

Politico Playbook reported this morning that on top of Cheney's impertinent words against Dear Leader, Kevin McCarthy might also be mad that Cheney last week "seemed to endorse the idea of a 9/11-style commission to investigate Jan. 6," like a common Nancy Pelosi. Playbook noted that any kind of fair commission would "almost certainly" send a subpoena to McCarthy's doorstep, considering all the reports of his phone calls with Trump that day. We'd also highlight the newer news that on January 6, when his office was being evacuated, McCarthy literally left behind GOP Rep. Bruce Westerman of Arkansas, who had to STEAL A CIVIL WAR SWORD FROM MCCARTHY'S OFFICE TO PROTECT HIMSELF WHILE HE SQUATTED ON KEVIN MCCARTHY'S TOILET.

That's right, if you hadn't heard that news yet, Kevin McCarthy was rushed to safety, and he left Bruce Westerman to fend for himself during the attack, which Westerman did by STEALING A CIVIL WAR SWORD FROM MCCARTHY'S OFFICE FOR PROTECTION, WHILE HE SQUATTED ON KEVIN MCCARTHY'S TOILET.

"Leadership," they call it.

McCarthy said on "Fox & Friends" this morning that he's not mad about Cheney voting for impeachment or anything else, but more or less said she's just real bad at her job. Axios bullet points the news:

  • "I have heard from members concerned about her ability to carry out the job as conference chair, to carry out the message. We all need to be working as one if we're able to win the majority," he [said].
  • "I haven't heard members concerned about her vote on impeachment. It's more concerned about the job ability to do and what's our best step forward that we can all work together instead of attacking one another."

Good bullet points, Axios.

But then Axios followed up just a few minutes ago with LATE BREAKING, which is that McCarthy got caught on a hot mic saying what he really thinks:

I think she's got real problems," McCarthy told Steve Doocy off-air ahead of a live "Fox and Friends" interview. "I've had it with ... I've had it with her. You know, I've lost confidence. ... Well, someone just has to bring a motion, but I assume that will probably take place."

Well then, Kevin.

Anyway, that's where things are. They all hate each other, and we are reluctantly on Liz Cheney's side, even though that feels weird and wrong.

Hey, wouldn't it be funny if Cheney was the one leaking to Tucker Carlson about how Kevin McCarthy and Frank Luntz are sittin' in a tree, A-L-L-E-G-E-D-L-Y?

[CNN / Axios]

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Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the managing editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

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