London Bridge Terrorist Taken Down By Narwhal Tusk And Fire Extinguisher-Wielding Bystanders
Yesterday, 28-year-old Usman Khan killed two people in a terroristic knife attack on London Bridge, while out on parole after having served time for his part in a plot to blow up the London Stock Exchange. Ironically, Khan was reportedly there to attend a conference organized by the University of Cambridge on rehabilitating offenders.
He was shot and killed by police after revealing what appeared to be a suicide bomber vest, but which later turned out to be a fake.
However, prior to the police shooting Khan, some bystanders managed to actually tackle him, get his knife away from him and hold him down, preventing him from hurting anyone else. Said bystanders included a Polish immigrant chef known only as "Luckasz," who works at the Fishmonger's Hall building on the London bridge, a 24-year-old tour guide named Thomas Gray, and convicted murderer James Ford, 42, who reportedly tried to save the life of a woman who was stabbed. In the scramble, Luckasz wielded a 5-foot narwhal tusk he had gotten from somewhere inside the Fishmonger's Hall, while another man sprayed Khan with a fire extinguisher, and I think that might be the most impressive thing I have ever seen or heard of in my life.
Imagine being a gun nut in America today and still trying to convince the world that said gun makes you a total bad ass when there are Polish chefs out there taking down terrorists with narwhal tusks.
Knife attacks like this are something the gunhumpers love to bring up every time someone brings up mass shootings, as if they are basically the same thing. Except the thing of it is, this guy was only able to kill two people before being taken down by a narwhal tusk and a fire extinguisher. That's just not a thing that can happen with a gun! You try taking a guy with a gun down with a narwhal tusk and a fire extinguisher, and you are definitely going to die.
As tragic as it is that two people died in this attack, if it had happened in the United States, there would be at least 30 more people dead. Shockingly enough, it is a lot harder to kill a lot of people with a knife than it is to kill a lot of people with a gun specifically designed to kill a whole lot of people at once.
Being that it is a holiday weekend, Rebeca has me doing just one post a day, so that I am then free to go on my merry way and continue eating my way through the state of Rhode Island. Which means that this, Wonkers, is your open thread! Enjoy!
Wonkette is independent and fully funded by readers like you. Click below to tip us!
Robyn Pennacchia is a brilliant, fabulously talented and visually stunning angel of a human being, who shrugged off what she is pretty sure would have been a Tony Award-winning career in musical theater in order to write about stuff on the internet. Previously, she was a Senior Staff Writer at Death & Taxes, and Assistant Editor at The Frisky (RIP). Currently, she writes for Wonkette, Friendly Atheist, Quartz and other sites. Follow her on Twitter at @RobynElyse