Strained peas EVERYWHERE

Let's say you've just won a special election for a seat in your state senate. Let's also say that although the governor of your state is from the other political party, he has already scheduled your swearing-in ceremony for 8:50 Friday morning. It would make a lot of sense for you to show up for the solemn occasion -- early, of course, and wearing something nice -- fully expecting to be sworn in, yes? Ah, but let's add another factor: Let's say you're state Senator-elect Susan Deschambault of Maine, and you're a Democrat who just won a special election Tuesday, and the governor who scheduled your swearing-in ceremony is near-universally-loathed spiteweasel Paul LePage. In that case, you might not be too surprised when the governor refused to show up to swear you in at the appointed time, because he was having himself a fine little hissy fit. What you would do is roll your eyes and do your very best to keep from saying out loud "Oh. It's THIS asshole again."

You see, on Thursday, Democrats on the Labor Committee voted against confirming Steven Webster, a LePage appointee to Maine's Unemployment Insurance Commission. So obviously, it only makes sense the Governor would punish Democrats by refusing to swear in a just-elected state senator who had absolutely nothing to do with Webster's confirmation vote.

LePage spokestoady Adrienne Bennett explained, in terms that only a partisan hack could consider passive-aggressive, that it was all Democrats' fault that the governor was unable to do his job Friday, leaving Deshambault standing at an empty podium with no oath to take:

“Democrats treated Steve Webster despicably and it’s unfortunate that good people get caught up in political games,” Bennett said in a statement. “Governor LePage has not sworn Ms. Deschambault in yet. The governor has five days to do so.”

Presumably LePage will get to it when he's good and ready, at the very last minute, or at least when the Democrats decide to stop hurting Ms. Deschambault with all their terrible political games that force LePage to strike back against her.

Later on Friday, LePage's office notified Mike Thibodeau, the state senate's president, that he was withdrawing Webster's nomination, and that he was also withdrawing two other unrelated nominations for positions on other state boards. LePage didn't say why he was withdrawing the other nominees, who hadn't yet come up for a vote.

The Portland Press Herald reports Deschambault initially thought she was merely the victim of LePage's puckish sense of humor:

Deschambault said she initially wondered whether she was the victim of an April Fool’s joke when she was told the ceremony would not happen.

“The governor owes it to the state and owes it to a group of people in southern Maine who are waiting to have someone represent them and vote for them and their interests,” Deschambault told reporters. “That’s been since the end of January. It took a long time to get elected. I am here today and I am waiting and waiting, and so are the people back home.”

Sources close to the situation inform Wonkette that LePage spent much of Friday stomping around his office and muttering he would "take his nominees and go home." The entire Democratic membership of both the House and Senate have reportedly been uninvited from LePage's birthday party. Attempts to reach Gov. LePage's office for comment were answered only by a voicemail message saying, "Do you hear a phone ringing? I don't hear a phone ringing," followed by what sounded like someone farting into a phone receiver.

[Maine Beacon / Bangor Daily News / Portland Press Herald]

Doktor Zoom

Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.

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