Marco Rubio Stars In 'Dipsh*ts In Cars Blathering About Socialism'

Marco Rubio posted a very important video to Twitter today to warn Americans to 1) not trust American elections and 2) beware of Bernie Sanders, who would surely take away your freedom and make America a Marxist hellhole with no freedom, just like every other Democratic presidential candidate since FDR was supposed to only this time the threat is REAL. Rubio is not just trying to score cheap points with idiots, how dare you say that!

Here's Rubio, looking very concerned about how the Democrats may either steal the primary from the scary Vermont socialist, or far worse, NOT steal the primary from him. Also, maybe Rubio posted to Twitter clear evidence of himself violating Florida's new law against taking selfies while driving, but he did it for America so it's OK with Alan Dershowitz.

Driving along while dividing his attention between the road and his phone, Rubio explains that all socialism is bad, very bad, and almost as bad as the "Democratic establishment":

The bottom line is that unless the Democratic establishment steals it from him, Bernie Sanders — a democratic socialist — is gonna be the Democratic nominee for president. And that's a really big deal, because democratic socialism sounds benign, but at the core of democratic socialism is Marxism.

And at the core of Marxism is this fake offer, that if you turn over more of your individual freedom, we're gonna provide you security, we're gonna provide you free health care, we're gonna provide you free education. But the problem is, that when they can't deliver on it, or you're not happy with it, you don't get your freedoms back.

And by freedoms, I don't just mean elections, I'm talking about the right to choose your own doctor, the right to make healthcare decisions for yourself, what your kids learn in school, what schools they go to, all that stuff, you lose control over, and you don't get it back, just because the security they promised you didn't happen.

So that's what we're on the verge of having to decide here in this country. It's the reason people flee countries that have this stuff. It's a big deal for America, and I hope people start waking up to that reality.

Mind you, there were socialist movements prior to Marx, and social democracies, like in Scandinavia, seem to have managed to provide education and healthcare without utterly quashing individual liberty, or for that matter, privately-owned businesses. Or so they'd have us believe. (This is also where we really need to get into a three-hour tussle about the shadings of difference between whether Sanders is really a "democratic socialist" or a "social democrat," regardless of what he calls himself.)

Rubio has been on something of a tear about socialism lately, because he's VERY CONCERNED about America's future! He's OK with "Common Good Capitalism," whatever that is, because "capitalism" is right there in the name, but it's also for the common good, making it nice and fair.

Basically, he's OK with government throwing money at corporations, but not helping people, because he just is, as he says in that linked interview:

Big innovations in manufacturing often occur when the government partners with large companies to fulfill defense contracts that meet our national security needs. Small businesses and start-ups are essential to developing the technologies and commercializing the products that often come out of these contracts.

Which sounds a heck of a lot like the thing Sanders has been calling "corporate socialism," but Rubio would explain it's not socialism at all, because somebody's company gets a cut, and no people are enslaved by having their doctors' visits paid for by the government. Their employers get the handout, some of which may help them, but they're still free to choose the in-network doctor their insurer, if any, allows them to see, and they remain free to go bankrupt after a medical emergency.

We can only assume Rubio is delighted to know that American subsidies to fossil fuel companies are actually higher than the Pentagon budget, protecting freedom through beautiful, beautiful greenhouse gases.

Rubio was especially upset by a "60 Minutes" clip of Sanders defending some things he said about Castro's Cuba, because Rubio knows literally nothing good ever happened under Castro:

Sure, Sanders, in the clip, very explicitly condemns Castro's human rights violations, but Rubio didn't have room to mention that. Probably would have gone over the character limit.

And while he was extolling the kindness of capitalism and the evils of Marxist socialism, the only kind there is, ever, Rubio also passed along what appears to be a made-up Marx quote, by way of the late archbishop Fulton J. Sheen.

Turns out that particular formulation isn't from Marx at all. Rather, it's it's from a 1953 book by Sheen, who not incidentally supported Franco in the Spanish Civil War, because fascism may have had its downsides, but at least it respected the Church. Here's Sheen's version:

And it's true, Marx DID say something like that. He was talking about the value of human labor, which has meaning only insofar as someone's willing to pay for it. So yeah, Marx's critique of capitalism gets twisted here: He's saying under capitalism, people only matter as much as they can produce labor -- not that human lives have no meaning to Marxists.

In conclusion, Marco Rubio is a hell of a liar, isn't he? And remember, whether Sanders is nominated or not, the fix is in. BE AFRAID. And keep your eyes on the damn road.

And now you may have OPEN THREAD!

[Marco Rubio on Twitter / Business insider / Vox / American Affairs / Rolling Stone / Google Books / NYT]

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Doktor Zoom

Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.


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