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Once upon a time, this nobody governor in, uhh, one of the southern states, but not a famous one like Florida, got a book deal. He was supposed to write about how to be conservative or something,A Southern Gentleman's Guide To Being Conservative, but then this nobody governor turned into Mark Sanford, the Sparkin' Thing, with his soulmate The Argentine Firecracker, and his nice wife The Kindly Wife Who Kept It Together, and basically we were in teevee miniseries territory, so of course Sanford's publisher has killed his book. What?


The New York Observer reports:

As promised, the folks at Sentinel, the conservative imprint of Penguin, have come to a decision about South Carolina Governor Mark Sanford's book on fiscal conservatism. According to a statement sent out just now by associate publisher Will Weisser, Sentinel has "agreed to release" Governor Sanford from his contract in light of the scandal that brought his promising political career in the Republican party to an end last week. The brief statement called it a "mutual decision."

Okay, so exactly nine (9) people would've bought Mark Sanford's boring-ass book about "fiscal conservatism," because Mark who? But the rumors were that Sanford would "rejigger" the manuscript into a sexy adulterous family-hating Argentine-fucking line-crossing literary tour de force, the Southern Gothic Emo-Yacht Club-Preppie Le Scaphandre et le Papillon of our time.

The conservative publisher wanted no part of this Latin Sexytime. Mark Sanford will have to fall in love with an 11-year-old urchin boy if he wants to sell his sex memoirs to Republicans.

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