Marvel CEO Thinks Girl Superheroes Can Eat It

• Women ruin everything, what with being women, as women do, but it's not just limited to everything. They ruin otherwise perfectly good movies about superheroes too. Ugh! According to an email from Marvel CEO Ike Perlmutter (a man) sent to Sony CEO Michael Lynton (also a man), there is ample evidence that movies about girl superheroes are total FAILS, no need to even bother making those anymore:

  1. Electra (Marvel) – Very bad idea and the end result was very, very bad. http: //www.boxofficemojo.com/movies/?id=elektra.htm

  2. Catwoman (WB/DC) – Catwoman was one of the most important female character within the Batmanfranchise. This film

  was a disaster. http: //www.boxofficemojo.com/movies/?id=catwoman.htm

  3. Supergirl – (DC) Supergirl was one of the most important female super hero in Superman franchise. This Movie

  came out in 1984 and did $14 million total domestic with opening weekend of $5.5 million. Again, another disaster.

  In case you are not familiar with the GINORMOUS lady superhero movie genre, Jessica Goldstein reminds us thatSupergirlwas released in 1984 (that is more than 30 years ago, for the girl readers who can't do math). And then, like some kind of smart-ass uppity lady superhero, Goldstein lists a whole bunch of other movies released in the last 30 years, starring heroic penises, that were box office disasters. Shockingly, there are a lot of them, and shockingly again, movie studios still make movies about superheroes. Andthento be super annoying, like a girl, she lists some more movies, featuring heroic vaginas, that have been super successful, AHEM. You should read Goldstein's whole piece, it is great.

• When Willie Nelson offers you a joint, you don't say no:  

  The first thing you notice when you get on Willie Nelson's tour bus is a pungent aroma. Parked outside a gigantic casino and performance venue in Thackerville, Okla., Nelson offers NPR's David Greene a joint, which Greene declines. Nelson says he understands.

  At 82, Nelson is still touring the country, still an advocate for legalized marijuana — he's even started a new company to sell weed in Colorado — and has a new memoir out called It's A Long Story. The country legend recently spoke to Greene about the mystery of Willie Nelson, how ex-wives are really "additional wives" and why no one can tell him what to do.

• Indicted former Texas Gov. Rick Perry, showing off yet again just how smart those glasses make him:

  “I think it’s OK to question your government — I do it on a pretty regular basis," Perry told reporters here before a luncheon for the World Affairs Council of Dallas/Fort Worth. "The military's something else."

  "You know, I think our military is quite trustworthy," Perry added. "Civilian leadership – you can always question that, but not the men and women in uniform.”

  Civilians are sneaky and terrible, but you should never question someone in uniform. Those guys and gals can ALWAYS be trusted, so long as you don't know anything at all about the bad apples in America's military. But at least Perry's slightly smarter than the current Texas governor, which is really saying something:

  Perry's remarks came in response to a question about the decision by his successor, Greg Abbott, to have the Texas State Guard monitor the operation, known as Jade Helm 15. Asked after the luncheon whether he was criticizing Abbott, Perry did not reply.

• Our friends at Happy Nice Time People are brave enough to confess their guilty TV pleasure:  

   Dance Moms , if you somehow don’t know, is a reality TV series centering on the Pittsburgh-based Abby Lee Dance Company, starring Abby Lee Miller and theunlucky prepubescent girls who are part of her competitive dance team, along with their beloved (s)mothers, who often argue with Abby and each other to secure their children the best solos.

  It’s controversial, it’s dramatic, it’s fake, it’s everything wrong with America.

  And I love it.

  Here’s why:

  Go check out the reasons, and feel free to confess your own guilty TV pleasures in the comments, which we do not allow.

• Everything youreallyneed to know about Brown Recluse spiders:  

  The bottom line is that Brown Recluse spiders are extremely common in some areas but hardly ever bite anyone, and totally absent from vast areas where they are blamed, incorrectly, for the occasional lesion.

  There are definitely dangerous spiders, and the Brown Recluse is one of them. But the human reaction to spiders in general, and even to the species that do have a nasty bite, is almost always overblown, as least in Western culture.

• Apparently, Amazon has stopped categorizing toys for boys and girls, so now you'll have no way of knowing what to buy Junior to make sure he turns out nice and butch. Oh well!