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Mass. State Senator Unleashes Devastating "I'm Rubber, You're Glue" Defense

America's sexiest MassholeWe knew it was time to embrace State Government Asshole day at Wonkette when this tip ended up in our mailbox. Seems that Scott Brown, a Massachusetts state senator who opposes gay marriage, had some foul language written about him and his daughter (an American Idol contestant) by high school students on the Facebook page of a pro-gay-marriage history teacher. Naturally, he responded the way any mature adult in a position of authority would: by appearing at an assembly at the school that the kids attended and reading aloud their obscenity-laden comments, with their names, while horrified teachers begged him to stop.


Later, Brown reiterated his long-held belief that being an asshole is fun.

"If the kids can write it, the kids can hear it," Brown said Friday.

Brown said he left the school Thursday feeling pleased that so many of the students seemed highly engaged in the discussion about divisive issues such as gay marriage. "I felt really good about it. And now I find out I'm being portrayed as a vile-speaking hate-monger. It's pretty saddening. I feel very badly that I'm being victimized here."

Brown has given various conflicting answers when asked exactly he found the offending comments in the first place, which means that he no doubt enjoys trolling Facebook for those who write unpleasant things about him and then hounding them relentlessly like the Furies of ancient Greek mythology.

While picking on the dude's daughter is not very nice, we have no compunctions about pointing out the fact that Brown won some kind of "Hunkiest He-Hunk" contest in Cosmo in 1982, which resulted in the photo spread you see above there. All that man meat is for the ladies only, though. STOP GAY MARRYING HIM WITH YOUR EYES, HOMOS!

Senator repeats bad language written about him [Boston Globe]

Senator's actions were out of line [Mansfeild News]

More sexy Scott Brown pictures [MySpace]

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It's the night before the two-night Democratic primary debate extravaganza, and we're already tired. Turns out having 20 candidates spread across two nights when only six or eight of them matter is not the must-see TV we all thought it was going to be! But that's not to dissuade you from getting excited! We're excited! We're so excited! We're so ...

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SCARED!

In case you need a reminder, here is how it's going to go down:

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Lately he's been blowing smoke from another orifice.

After a cursory examination of the TWELVE filings in the case against California Congressman Duncan Hunter just in the past 24 hours, we can confidently declare that that guy is a fucking idiot. The prosecutors have him by every last one of his short and curlies -- which is what happens when you use your campaign credit card to pay for hundreds of thousands of dollars of ski trips, video games, tuition, and plane tickets for the family rabbit.

A rational human being would have pleaded down a year ago and given up his congressional seat, since he could cash out and make a lot more money as a lobbyist anyway. But not Duncan Hunter! He made the federal government chase him down and document every last carton of cigarettes, round of tequila, and Uber ride of shame home from his many girlfriends' houses in a 60-count indictment filed last August. And still this dumb sumbitch refused to admit he was caught, even after his lovely wife (and co-conspirator) Margaret Hunter flipped on him this month -- which is what happens when you use your campaign credit card to carry on multiple affairs and you piss off the US Attorneys enough that they put every 7 a.m. Uber ride in your indictment.

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