Gay Hatin' Cake Nazi Hates Transgender Cakes Too, What A Big Shock
Some folks just can't be happy. Take Jack Phillips. He runs the boldly titled Masterpiece Cakeshop (hey, I'll be the judge of that ... if he'd actually bake a cake for me) in suburban Denver. A gay couple wanted him to mix flour and eggs together for them in celebration of their legal marital union, and he refused because this violated his religious freedom to believe gays are gross. The case went all the way to the Trump-tainted Supreme Court, which ruled in favor of Phillips on very specific and narrow legal grounds that I won't get into here because do I look like a Five Dollar Feminist?
Anyway, Phillips prevailed in the bigoted TV movie that would air on an evil Lifetime network. Donald Trump, who apparently believes Phillips's name is "Baker," praised the court decision. All was well, right? Wrong! That's what a gay atheist would think. Phillips is still subject to the outrageous persecution of people who want to be treated like human beings!
The Denver Post reports that Phillips filed suit against Colorado Gov. John Hickenlooper and other state officials Tuesday. The drama queen claims the state has renewed its "crusade" against him because he's just a man, standing in a cake shop, asking the state to not force him to violate his arbitrary religious beliefs.
According to the suit, the Colorado Civil Rights Commission ruled that he once again violated the state's nondiscrimination law when he refused to bake [a] cake. This time, it was for Autumn Scardina, an Arvada woman celebrating her birthday and the seventh anniversary of her gender transition.
On June 26, 2017, Scardina, a lawyer, filed a complaint with the commission claiming that the cake shop denied her request for a cake — blue on the outside and pink on the inside to represent her transition.
A store employee declined the request because the custom cake would have expressed messages about sex and gender identity that conflict with Phillips' religious beliefs, according to Scardina's complaint with the Civil Rights Commission.
Really? "Baker" can't make a cake that's "blue on the outside and pink on the inside"? He thinks that represents some obscene gender identity message? It's just a cake, man. Interestingly, Phillips once claimed he had no problem selling a "birthday cake," among other non-icky-gay-wedding-related foods, to the gay couple from the previous case. The Civil Rights Commission determined that Masterpiece's refusal to serve Ms. Scardina violated her rights to "equal enjoyment of a place of public accommodation." According to Phillips's legal team, Masterpiece Cakeshop was ordered to attempt an "amicable resolution by compulsory mediation" with Scardina, or in layman's terms "cake counseling."
Members of Stupid Force, even those who are just in the reserves like Sarah Palin, predictably freaked out over what they considered yet another example of state religious persecution.
BREAKING: Colorado Defies Supreme Court Ruling, Punishing Masterpiece Christian Baker for Refusing Transgender Cake https://t.co/rRJ1D7Qodv— Sarah Palin (@Sarah Palin)1534396068.0
I hesitate to differ with such a reliable news source as "Chicks on the Right," but Colorado isn't "defying" the Supreme Court. The previous ruling specifically "kept the state's nondiscrimination laws intact" but said the state commission "did not appropriately weigh Phillips's religious rights," which are an obvious pretense for blatant bigotry. See? That mean thing I just said about how his religious beliefs are just bigotry wasn't legally chill, a lesson the Colorado Civil Rights Commission likely learned by now. The commission will probably make solemn faces, nod sagely with their hands posed like steeples, say nothing at all that is unkind about Phillips's beliefs and then ... politely order Phillips to go out there and bake cakes for people like it's goddamn America or something.
"Baker" hasn't been punished -- no more than an Alabama Waffle House in the 1960s was punished when required to also serve black people hash browns that have been smothered and covered. And the cake itself isn't "transgender." Does Palin think the cake is actually a pie and that it's against Christian law to force her to acknowledge the "pie" as a "cake"? Does she plan on petulantly "mis-desserting" the cake?
I'm starting to think Phillips is in the wrong business. LGBTQ people are going to want to celebrate special events like weddings, anniversaries, or in Scadina's case, her own continued existence. Cakes are a common feature in such celebrations. It's not their fault Phillips chose a line of work that is guaranteed to conflict with his supposed religious views. It's like if a pacifist opened a gun shop but insisted the weapons he sold could only be used to balance wobbly tables.
Christian supremacists religious liberty supporters among the right who believe Sarah Huckabee Sanders has a Constitutional right to eat wherever she wants will likely point out that Denver has other cake shops and the people who Phillips discriminates against should just go elsewhere. This is the free market, after all, and I totally agree. LGBTQ people and non-gross people should totally consider taking their cake business elsewhere.
For your free market pleasureGoogle Maps
Phillips has whined that he lost 40 percent of his business when he previously stopped making wedding cakes at all rather than make them for gay people. It would totally be a shame if that percentage reached 100.
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Stephen Robinson is a writer and social kibbitzer based in Portland, Oregon. He's on the board of the Portland Playhouse theater and writes for the immersive theater Cafe Nordo in Seattle. Tickets are on sale now for his latest Nordo collaboration, "Curiouser and Curiouser," an adaptation of "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland" and "Through the Looking Glass." It promises to feel like an actual evening with SER (for good or for ill).