Donate

KY Gov Matt Bevin Thinks Kids Are 'Soft' For Not Freezing To Death

Science

Kentucky's teabagging, gay hating, and cock-fighting Governor Matt Bevin (R, fucking duh) just called everyone a bunch of pussies because schools are closing due to it being negative fuck-your-face degrees throughout the Midwest. According to Bevin, "We're getting soft," because school officials thought it was too dangerous to make kids trudge through the polar vortex when cities like Chicago are literally colder than the basecamp at Mount Everest. So what if it's so cold people are getting frostbite in minutes, those little brats should man-up! Grow some chest hair, and Jack Frost will stop nipping at your lungs.

Bevin was comfortably gabbing in his safe space, a local rightwing AM radio station, when the host joked that Bevin was going to be up late with his kids because the schools had closed due to weather.

BEVIN: Now we cancel school for cold.

HOST: It's deep freeze! This is serious business.

BEVIN: It is? Come on now. I mean, there's no ice going with it, or snow. I mean, what happens to America? We're getting soft, Terry. We're getting soft.

HOST: It costs a lot of money to heat those classrooms.

BEVIN: You think they're not heating them anyway?

HOST: They'll put it on 65.

BEVIN: You would like to think so. As a taxpayer we would like to think so. Again, I do appreciate -- it's better to err on the side of being safe, and I'm being only slightly facetious, but it does concern me a little bit that in America on this, and any number of other fronts, we're sending a messages to our young people that if life is hard you can curl up in the fetal position somewhere in a warm place and just wait until it stops being hard [chuckle], and that just isn't reality. It just isn't.

Bevin seems to have confused the definition of "facetious" with "heartless," or "asshole," because the National Weather Service has issued a cold weather warning, numerous travel advisories, and snow forecasts throughout his state of denial. Public health officials across the country have been warning that people die in sub-zero temperatures because ignorant douchebags forget they're 65 percent water, and 45 percent bullshit. And even the US Postal Service thinks it's too damn cold!



Since the carpetbagging Bevin grew up in New Hampshire and attended a $60,000 prep school, local officials informed him that many kids in Kentucky don't have gloves and scarfs. They're likely to get frostbite if they put some "skin in the game." The Courier Journal notes some school officials were told by National Weather Service NOT to send kids to school before making their decision. Maybe Bevin is worried that kids are going to sit around the house getting high as fuck and fondling each other -- a charge he made last year -- if they stay home?

Bevin was quickly ripped a new asshole on social media by a bunch of people he's probably blocked, like Kentucky Teacher of the Year Jessica Dueñas. Dueñas challenged Bevin to walk his hard ass outside and stand around for 30 minutes like a kid waiting for the bus. "I guarantee you," Dueñas scolded Bevin, "most of our students are not wearing some fancy Patagonia or North Face jackets. How about you give one of our students your jackets, and you stand outside in that cold, since you're being so 'hard?'"

What she said.

[ WaPo / WHAS / Courier-Journal]

Wonkette doesn't have a cold, cold heart, but we do need money to keep the heaters. IT'S COLD!

How often would you like to donate?

Select an amount (USD)


Dominic Gwinn

Dominic is a broke journalist in Chicago. You can find him in a dirty bar talking to weirdos, or lying in a gutter taking photos.

$
Donate with CC

The South just can't quit their memorials to racist traitors. They regularly pitch a fit if black folks try to take down a statue honoring people who fought and died to keep us slaves. Now someone from the heritage and totally not hate crowd has proposed building a brand new one in the rural town of Taneytown, Maryland.

Sculptor Gary Casteel swears up and down, though, that the project is in truth not a Confederate monument but a National Civil War Memorial, a "balanced educational tool." The planned circular monument would measure 90 feet in diameter and feature 16 military leaders and 16 civilians. And then it gets weird.

Keep reading... Show less
$
Donate with CC

Morning Wonketariat! Here's some of the things we may be talking about today.

Keep reading... Show less
$
Donate with CC
Donate

How often would you like to donate?

Select an amount (USD)

Newsletter

©2018 by Commie Girl Industries, Inc