Stupid Michael Flynn Bad At Bible, Bad At Constitution, Bad At America

Let's check in on Michael Flynn, we haven't done that in a while, eh? Probably a good idea, since Russia is currently engaged in genocidal war against innocents, you never know who Michael Flynn's giving aid and comfort to.

For instance, the last time we checked with Flynn, he was releasing statements about how Russia's invasion of Ukraine was Joe Biden's fault (not Vladimir Putin's fault), which even played such Kremlin greatest hits as "Putin's legitimate security concerns" and "legitimate ethnic problems in the Ukraine." The time before that, it was because Flynn was involved in what sure looked like an extortion plot to get Republican members of Congress from Pennsylvania to back a harebrained audit to help overturn the 2020 election.

You know, typical Michael Flynn stuff.

This time, you'll be glad to learn it's just about what a stupid idiot Michael Flynn is, oh golly what a numbnuts. He needs to put down his all-Putin-all-the-time commemorative issue of the Russian version of Playgirl and read the Bible and the Constitution, because that stupid idiot told a crowd in Oklahoma that the word "creator" appears in the Constitution four times.

SPOILER: As Right Wing Watch, which flagged this clip, explains, the word "creator" appears in the Constitution no times.


Flynn was doing an event for that batshit Jackson Lahmeyer, the QAnon nutbag in Oklahoma who is trying to primary GOP Senator James Lankford. And oh boy, he gave a barnburner of a speech:

On Saturday, he used his time at Lahmeyer’s campaign rally to deliver a rambling speech insisting that this nation is locked in “a spiritual war” against the likes of House Speaker Nancy Pelosi—who he called “a demon”—and therefore needs elected leaders like Lahmeyer who realize that the rights enshrined in the Constitution and the Bill of Rights come from God.

Yuh huh.

“Democracy is always a fragile type,” Flynn said. “You read the Federalist Papers, you read [the Founder’s] writings—because this is all about the people that we’re talking about tonight running for office, and others that are out there—you read all these things, you study the history of this country, you study how it was founded. That’s why the word ‘Creator’ is in the Constitution four times. ‘We are endowed by our Creator.'”

No, STUPID. That's the Declaration of Independence that says that, you big STUPID.

“When you go home, look at the Bill of Rights and lay the Ten Commandments right down next to them,” Flynn continued.

Now turn one of them in the other direction and make them 69.

“Put them right next to each other, and you’ll get a sense of how they developed the Bill of Rights. The rights that the Creator gave us. These are God-given rights; these are not man-given rights.”

It was like some Jesus nitwit crafting session, apparently, the way they "developed" the Bill of Rights, which God gave them.

“Then you take two other documents, our Constitution and for those who study the Bible, and you look at those two documents because there’s so much [in common],” Flynn added.

Especially the action scenes.

We mostly wrote this post because Russia's war on Ukraine is getting worse and worse and every time we see awful pictures and hear awful stories, we want to remind folks that it started with people like Michael Flynn defending Putin and explaining why this is all the fault of Joe Biden and uhhhhhhh critical race theory or something.

So if stupid Michael Flynn gets in front of a group of MAGA stupids and stupidly says the word "creator" is all over the Constitution, we'll take that opportunity.

[Right Wing Watch]

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Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the managing editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

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